"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Updates, a meme, and a joke...

Marty has his first band concert tonight. The band at his middle school will be performing a Christmas concert tonight. He is very excited and very nervous at the same time. Please wish him luck. And, wish me luck so I can keep Gabe quiet during the concert...LOL.

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Our black kitten, Max, has turned into the great goldfish hunter. I have caught him up on the shelf with a paw reaching toward the water 5 times in the past few days. I've explained to him that sushi isn't on the menu but he doesn't seem to believe me. Vic said we should replace the goldfish with a piranha and that should cure Max of his sushi craving.

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I get to go on a field trip next week. Joey's class is visiting the Historic Oak View County Park. There are 3 museums on site: a Cotton Museum, a Farm History Center, and an 1850 Antebellum house. They currently have a "Christmas at Oak View Farm" exhibit set up that shows what it was like to celebrate the holidays back in the 1800s. It should be a lot of fun.

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I got tagged by Jenn of Patience is a Virtue. I am suppose to tell you 6 random things about myself.

The Rules
Link to the person who tagged you.
Post the rules on your blog.
Write 6 random things about yourself.
Tag 6 people at the end of your post.
Let each person know he/she has been tagged.
Let the tagger know when your entry is up.

Random Facts
1) My best friend in 2 and 3 grade was the daughter of a mafia family.
2) My underwear frequently costs more than the outfit covering it. That tends to happen when you have to buy bras for $80 a piece.
3) I HAVE to have a live Christmas tree. I've tried to talk myself into a fake tree. I've argued economics and the ease of clean up. It didn't work. I still buy a live tree every year.
4) I have lived in 3 countries and 4 states during my life. I have visited many more. While I want to continue to travel, I would be perfectly content to never move again.
5) My parents were both oldest children and my hubby and I are both oldest children.
6) My dream car is a '64 1/2 Mustang ragtop. I know red wasn't an original color but I'd take this one...


I have tagged a lot of people recently so I'm not tagging anyone specific on this one. Its an open tag...if you wanna be tagged, you are.

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RETIREMENT BONUS

If this doesn't make you laugh, you are truly humor impaired!

The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus. They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be.

The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked out with $96,000.

The third one was a noncommissioned officer, a grizzly old Chief who, when asked where he would like to b e measured replied, “From the tip of my weenie to my testicles.”

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider, explaining about the nice big checks the previous two Officers had received. But the old Chief insisted and they decided to go along with him providing the measurement was taken by a Medical Officer.

The Medical Officer arrived and instructed the Chief to “drop 'em,” which he did. The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Chief's weenie and began to work back. “Dear Lord!” he suddenly exclaimed, “Where are your testicles?”

The old Chief calmly replied, “Vietnam.”

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Have a fabulous day!

3 comments:

Jenn said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA~! Great joke!Thanks!

~Tammy said...

Love the joke.

Really funny is the kitty trying to catch a fish. Very self reliant little cutie.

Kymberli said...

What instrument does your son play? I'm a complete band nerd. Congrats on his first of many concerts!

That joke was great!