In Which He Channels His Inner Al Bundy

I had a very scary revelation earlier today. When my husband sleeps, he channels his inner Al Bundy. Those of you under the age of 30 might not know who Al Bundy is but you know the actor who plays him...Ed O'Neill/Jay Pritchett from Modern Family.

Now, Al Bundy was a character in Married with Children which was one of the funniest shoes on television. For the era it was on, Married with Children was groundbreaking and pushed the envelope of what was acceptable. Al was misanthropic, miserable, sarcastic, and judgmental. When Al was at home, you often saw him on the couch, in front of the TV, in a pose like this...

Yeah, Al sat around with his hand down his pants...something many men wish they could do.

Luckily, Vic is nothing like Al Bundy during his waking hours. I couldn't live with a man like that although I spent 10 yrs laughing at him on TV. But, I discovered my husband channels his inner Al Bundy when he sleeps. The past few days, when I've gone through our bedroom while Vic was sleeping, he was lying there sound asleep with his hand tucked into the waistband of his shorts. God help me...the Y chromosome is polluting his brain.

What embarrassing or funny trait does someone in your life have? Names can be falsified to protect the guilty...bwahahahaha.

Just the Facts Ma'am

Back in the beginning of March, I told y'all about our second trip down the Infertility highway. Then, I got all wrapped up dealing with Marty's never ending migraine (ended up lasting 2 months...until almost the end of April). I was so preoccupied that I totally forgot to write the post to tell y'all about the hopeful solution to our infertility issues.

To briefly sum it up, Vic was diagnosed as a diabetic in the beginning of 2006, shortly after Gabe was born. He has had a bitch of a case and it rapidly progressed to complete insulin dependence. His diabetes also tanked out his thyroid function and his testosterone levels. Vic is not only insulin dependent but he's extremely insulin resistant meaning he has to take enough insulin to stop an elephant in it's tracks (and high insulin doses cause weight gain).

For quite a while, Vic has been thinking about weight loss surgery. He was considering lap band surgery and, not long ago, finally made an appointment for a consult with a doc who specializes in bariatric surgery. He was very pleased with the surgeon he consulted with and Doc B will be his surgeon. However, Vic will be having gastric bypass surgery, not lap band surgery. Doc B said that he could make more money doing lap band because it is simpler and he can do more of them per day. However, Doc B said that if Vic insisted on lap band surgery then he would not be his doctor. He said he felt it would not be serving Vic's best interests to do lap band surgery. Doc B said that with the severity of Vic's diabetes and the large number of complications he was already experiencing that Vic needed to be aggressive in his treatment approach. A higher percentage of gastric bypass patients have full reversal of their diabetes that lap band patients  and, of the patients who don't have full reversal of their diabetes, there is a huge improvement. Both Doc B and Vic's endocrinologist are very hopeful that the weight loss and the ensuing improvement of his diabetes will reverse the peripheral neuropathy he has been experiencing. There might possibly be improvement in his testosterone levels and his hypothyroidism when his diabetes improves but, until then, he is being treated for both those issues. There are a ton of appointments he has to go through and a bunch of hoops he has to jump through before we schedule the surgery. Hopefully, it will be scheduled for sometime this fall.

Not really sure where we'll go from here. I'm 42 and Vic is 52. We are definitely pushing the edges of age for new parenthood (at least the ages we are comfortable with)...but, I won't say it'll never happen. Guess we'll just have to wait and see.

Be Afraid...Be Very, Very Afraid

Last night, while I was writing the post about the Crusty Ass Pancakes, my oldest son, Marty, and Vic had a discussion that alternately scared me and made me wonder what kind of good drugs they had been taking. Yes, it really was that weird a conversation.

It all started a couple of days ago, May 2nd to be exact. That was when I found this picture that Anissa posted via worth1000.com

I'm sure you can imagine how funny everyone in my family thought this Star Wars take off of the Last Supper is.

Last night when I was writing the other post, Vic and Marty started discussing this picture and quickly decided the artist had the wrong people in the positions. For example, they said Luke should not be in the Jesus position. Their pseudo-philosophical discussion quickly gathered steam and veered off the tracks. Pretty soon they weren't limiting themselves to who filled what last supper role but they were figuring out who filled what New Testament role. I'll give them a bit of credit...they at least limited themselves to one trilogy (1, 2,and 3) instead of tackling the whole Star Wars mythology.

I mentioned the Star Wars Last Supper picture and asked who was in the Jesus position...

Marty: Luke was in the Jesus position but I don't think he should have been.
Vic: Then who should have filled the role?
Marty: Well, it depends on which trilogy you are talking about...maybe movies 1, 2, and 3.
Vic: Ok, should Anakin be Jesus?
Marty: Nah, Mace Windu was the main good guy who died in the end. He would be Jesus.
Vic: Yeah, and Palpatine would be Pontious Pilate.
Marty: stops to think
Marty: If Mace Windu is Jesus, Obi Wan is the next main Jedi. He would be Peter because Peter was the main disciple.

I sit and bury my head in my hands, just shaking my head.

Vic: laughing What's wrong, hon?

I don't say anything but just go back to typing.

Marty: And, Anakin is the one who betrays everyone so he has to be Judas.
Vic: Yeah, yeah, Padme should be Mary Magdalene. It's a stretch because Mary Magdalene was closer to Jesus but I think it's the best female role for her.

Marty cracks up laughing. After a few minutes, he gets himself under control.

Marty: We're either going to hell or God is up there laughing his butt off at us.
Me: Only in my house...only you two...Y'all need serious mental help.


Please tell me I'm not the only one who has things like this happen. Should I be scared or just go with the flow? Does anyone else have any casting suggestions?

A Piece of Ass is Good for the Heart

Today, Vic and I went out on our bi-weekly date. We hit three locations, had some laughs, and spent a ton of money. Yup, we went grocery shopping..Wal-Mart, Sam's Club, and Aldi's. We were going through the store aisle by aisle and the cart was filling up. That's when he started...

Vic: Look hon. It's Crusty Ass Pancake mix.
Me: shoots Vic that look
Vic: No, really...you have to look.

against my better judgment, I looked

Vic: See, I told you...Crusty Ass Pancake mix...and it's even heart healthy.
Me: It is NOT pronounced Crusty Ass!
Vic: Well then, how is it pronounced? Cause it looks like Crusty Ass to me.
Me: Really? Crusty Ass? You had to go there?
Vic: I don't make this shit up. I just read it.
Me: still shooting Vic that look...
Vic: and, since it says heart healthy on the box, their new slogan could be "A Piece of Ass is Good for the Heart."

So, y'all, how would you pronounce the name of this pancake mix?

and, do you think Crusty Ass pancakes would go well with a side dish of Cock Soup?

When Vic Finally Stopped Being Stupid

Back when I wrapped up Vic's Story, I promised you our story and stories from the wayback machine. Life got it the way of my story telling. Between our extended house guests, Marty's medical crises, and all the other random shit life threw at me, my story telling mojo was wrapped up tight. Sure, I've been writing a lot but there have been a lot of times I've struggled with what to write about. Now that life is getting back to normal, the inspiration seems to be coming back. Have I got a story for you...

Some women have wonderful stories about their proposal. One of my friends from back in my rescue squad days has a story that will make you melt. On the day her husband proposed to her, he had set the stage. He had arranged for a picnic lunch after a hike in the woods to one of their favorite spots. He got down on his knee to propose to her with a ring he had custom designed. Its truly one of the most romantic proposals I've heard of...and, it really happened. My proposal was nothing like that. My proposal was better.

It was October of 1994, only about 5 months after Vic pissed me off enough to make me wanna kill him for the second time, and Vic had just gotten home from a 2 week stint at the National Fire Academy. He was telling me all about the different people he'd met up at the Fire Academy. He told me how a couple of the guys had come from a department somewhere up north and they'd recently lost a fellow firefighter in a fire. This firefighter who'd been killed in a fire had a common law wife. He had lived with here for more than 7 years but they'd never gotten married. When he died in that fire, she wasn't eligible to collect any of his benefits because she wasn't his wife. She didn't just lose him, she lost everything.You could hear in Vic's voice how badly this story affected him. Then, Vic looked at me and said "I can't let that happen to you. That's why we have to get married." We got married about a month later in a small civil ceremony.

Now, I know a bunch of you have to be thinking "How could she possibly think this proposal was better than her friend's proposal?" I don't just think it was better. I know it was better. Vic got over his sheer terror of marriage and commitment because he loved me. Vic decided it was more important to take care of me than it was to indulge his fears. Vic decided the love really does trump everything else. And, that perfect proposal I told you about in the beginning, they didn't last. But, the two warped, twisted people who could appreciate a proposal like we had, we're still going strong. In August, Vic and I will have been together for 20 years and, in November, we will celebrate 18 years of marriage. My proposal kicked ass.

Anyone else wanna share your story?

Love and Marriage

Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage
This I tell you brother
You can't have one without the other

Come this November, Vic and I will be celebrating our 18th wedding anniversary. In August, we will have spent 20 years of our life together. It blows my mind when I think about it. It seems like no time at all has passed since we met but, it also feels like he's been part of my life forever. I guess I have to own up to the almost 18 years of marriage since the living, breathing evidence of our years together are sleeping down the hall.  For me, love and marriage to Vic definitely go together. I can't imagine my life without him.

Love and marriage, love and marriage
It's an institute you can't disparage
Ask the local gentry
And they will say it's elementary

Loving Vic is elementary. He is my heart and soul. He makes me laugh like no one else does and holds me tight and makes me feel safe when times are tough. Marriage, well marriage isn't so elementary. Marriage is a hard ass road and, without the love and laughter, the effort it takes to get through the hard times will wear you down.

Try, try, try to separate them
It's an illusion
Try, try, try, and you will only come
To this conclusion

I really can't separate love from marriage. Love is what leads you to do the little things for your partner. Love is what gets you to do the dishes when all you really want is to go to bed because you know it drives your partner crazy to have dishes in the sink over night and you don't want him to feel like he needs to do dishes the minute he walks through the door from work. Love is what gets you to say, "If you need something, wake me up instead of your mom, she needs her sleep" even when you need your sleep too. These little things are what keeps a marriage running smoothly even when life keeps throwing shitstorm after shitstorm at you.

Love and marriage, love and marriage
Go together like the horse and carriage
Dad was told by mother
You can't have one, you can't have none, you can't have one without the other!

If you find someone you truly love, whether it's a man, a woman, or a three legged alien, that love can lead to one of the most miraculous of all things, a long term, happy marriage. Somehow, knowing that there is someone whose always got your back, who will support you completely, who loves you beyond reason, well, that makes you feel like you can move mountains and conquer the world.

Do you think marriage is important or is it just a piece of paper to you? Have you found the partner you want to spend your life with?

Infertility: Take 2

There are some of you who have been hanging around the Lair for quite a while. I have to guess that some of you remember way back in September '08 when I told y'all that Vic and I had decided to try for our 4th and final baby.  I'm sure those of you who remember also wonder why I went almost completely silent on the subject. With Vic's encouragement and consent, I'm finally going to tel you what's been going on.

Here in the Cruz household, we never tend to do anything in half measures. That applies to medical issues as well as just about everything else. Back in early 2006, Vic was diagnosed with type II diabetes. While it's not a diagnosis anyone wants to get, our attitude at the time was that at least it was a treatable and a manageable disease...little did we know.

I still remember one of the first things Vic's doctor asked him at that first appointment he had about learning to manage his diabetes. Dr. T looked at Vic and asked, "Have you noticed any decrease in your sex drive or ability to perform?" Vic laughed and said, "We have a 3 month old baby. Any change in sex drive has been chalked up to exhaustion." Well, Dr. T told him that erectile dysfunction is a frequent side effect of diabetes (due to impaired blood flow) and, if the sex drive didn't pick back up as the diabetes came under control, Vic should let him know. Viagra was mentioned but nothing was really pursued at that point.

Eventually, Viagra was prescribed and daddy's little helper took care of the issue. When we decided to try to complete our family, Viagra was obviously part of the plan but I didn't think it would have a major roll. Guess once again, thinking should have been labeled as being highly over-rated. Less than 3 months after we started trying again, Vic's diabetes decided to rebel. Blood sugars that had previously been fairly well controlled spiraled out of control. A pancreas that was feeling ignored by the body decided that since the body wasn't using it's insulin well that it would stop making insulin at all. Although he was still technically a type II diabetic, he was now completely insulin dependent and, when you factored in his extreme insulin resistance, he might as well have been a true brittle diabetic. At this point,Viagra did become a big part of our efforts but it became a big part of our TTC efforts not because it helped but because it stopped working reliably.

While Vic's endocrinologist eventually got his blood sugar under control, it took massive doses of insulin to do so. I swear, he takes insulin doses massive enough to drop an elephant in it's tracks. Those massive doses of insulin control his blood sugar levels but they never allowed the Viagra to work well again and the doses of insulin definitely never allowed us to ditch daddy's little helper. In fact, the massive doses of insulin caused (and still cause) all kinds of other issues such as weight gain (yeah, it really is a side effect of large doses of insulin) which exacerbated the diabetes. And, while Vic's blood sugar levels were mostly controlled, his weight went up, his energy levels went way down, and he started to develop peripheral neuropathy.

And, let me tell you, that peripheral neuropathy is a real bitch. When people talk about peripheral diabetic neuropathy, they think about it affecting primarily the feet with numbness and some pain. What no one ever tells you is that peripheral diabetic neuropathy can also cause some loss of sensation in the genital area for men. So, at this point you have blood flow issues and loss of sensation and Viagra not working, our TTC efforts came to a screeching halt. Honestly, I was mourning. I was mourning not only the loss of that potential 4th child but I was mourning the loss of our sex life. I loved and do love my husband. Nothing would ever change that but I missed our sex life.

At some point in all this, Vic had to change endocrinologists and that turned out to be a truly fabulous thing. His new doctor was the one who finally got a handle on his blood sugar and, a little over a year ago, that endocrinologist finally tested Vic's thyroid function...something that should have been checked from day one of his diabetic diagnosis but we didn't know to ask and his doc's missed it. Vic turned out to have a pretty severe case of hypothyroidism. His severely under functioning thyroid was a major cause of his lack of energy. Then, about 3 1/2 months ago, Vic switched endocrinologists once again because, while he loved the doc, the office staff for that doc sucked. The missed getting prescriptions called in, were slack about following up on requests, and Vic had had enough.

Once again, the doctor change turned out to be a wonderful thing. His new is truly sharp and on the ball. She was the first one who ever mentioned to Vic that not only is the thyroid frequently affected by diabetes but, often times, testosterone levels often hit the bottom of the barrel when the thyroid is so severely affected. Sure enough, once again it was a case of doing things in grand fashion. When it was tested, Vic's testosterone levels came back as being abnormally low. It was strike three against any possible TTC efforts and it was a classic case of male factor infertility diabetes style. It was infertility: take 2 for the Cruz family.

And, that is why I went silent on the topic for so long. While it was part of our infertility journey, it wasn't my story to tell...at least, not my story to tell without permission. Also, I just couldn't quite deal with it all until there was a possibility of some solution, some resolution. It was just too disheartening to talk about it all without a possible solution and there is now a potential for a solution. If anyone's interested in the possible solution (strictly medical info), I can talk about that later. This post is massive enough as it is. Thank you to all of you who've bravely soldiered through the reading of it.


Finally, I want to say a special and heartfelt thank you to my wonderful husband, Vic, for allowing me to share this story. It takes a special man to have the confidence to share a story like this. When I asked Vic if it was all right to share about this, he not only said yes, but he told me that he thought it was really important to get this information out so it could possibly help someone. To quote Vic directly, "When your body says fuck you, start getting tests done."

Randomosity

• The cookie cartel aka the Girl Scouts have my house under their thrall. We got our cookies the other night and my children (yeah, just my children, I'll stick with that story) have been inhaling them.
• Last night, Vic and I helped chaperone Marty's first military ball. It was held at the Matthews House (be warned, embedded music on the site but it gives you a gorgeous view of the house)  in Cary, NC.
• I think that the military ball is the only place you will ever see a bunch of teens loudly cheer a clumsily executed (by their peers) waltz. What a truly fabulous group of kids.
• I think the force was at work last night or maybe it was just the repellant power of the adults in attendance. All the kids gravitated towards the dark side of the dance floor which just happened to be away from the chaperones' tables.
• Like father, like son...both of them over did it yesterday and have been paying the price with sore legs. Marty decided to try and outrun everybody during ROTC physical fitness yesterday despite the fact that he had only been off his cane since Sunday night and then he danced through the whole military ball. Vic decided to overdo the dancing, ignored his bad knee, and now he's paying for it.
• We all had a blast. It was so nice dressing up and going out with my husband and Marty looked so grown up in his uniform.
• Gabe fell asleep against Vic tonight and then Vic promptly fell asleep too. Doesn't matter how old they are, something about a child sleeping on you is the world's best sleeping pill.
• Today was a down day...a quiet day for the whole family. It was nice.
• Tomorrow, we are going out to eat for a family dinner. My parents and my sister are joining us at a restaurant so we can celebrate Marty's birthday.
• Speaking of Marty's birthday, he will be 15 on Monday. How in the hell did that happen? My baby is almost 15.
• On a less happy note, Joey's migraines seem to have gotten worse with puberty. We are definitely going to have to make a doctor's appointment for him about this.

What's going on in your life? Tell me anything...or everything.

Wuv, Twue Wuv

Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder today. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam... 

Today, as even the most unobservant of us knows by now, was Valentine's Day...a celebration of romance and love. If you compared my day to a traditionally romantic Valentine's Day, most people would think it fell short...my husband is at work, we didn't exchange gifts, all we did was say Happy Valentine's Day and I love you. But, to me, it was an absolutely perfect day because it was another day married to the love of my life.

With my husband's work schedule and our kids' activity schedules, we don't often get the time to go out together...to just spend time alone...and that lack of time alone means we don't often get to make those grand romantic gestures. But, Vic shows me he loves me in the everyday things he does for me. Vic folds laundry. He does dishes. He cooks and cleans up. He does all these things because he says I do more than enough keeping up with the kids and their schedules.

Vic makes sure I have the more reliable of the two vehicles because he wants to make sure I'm safe. Vic tries to keep the kids occupied so I can sleep in on an occasional Saturday and, the past two years, he's taken part of his hard earned vacation so he can be home with the kids when I go off to BlogHer.

Everyday we are together, Vic shows me he loves me in a million little ways. To me, that is more romantic than a box of chocolates or a dozen roses.

Happy Valentine's Day sweetie. I love you more today than I did  when we first said I do back in 1994. Mawage twuly is a bwessed awangement for us.

Jose in Photos

my favorite picture

What Cornfield Did They Come From?

Years ago, when we still lived a few counties over (in Alamance county for those who know the area), we use to make the trip to Cary to visit with my Mother-in-law, father-in-law, and Jose at least once and often twice a month. When we'd arrive, *Jose would usually still be sleeping because of the schedule he kept. At the time, we only had Marty and Joey and after they spent a while with Grandma and Grandpa, they would start hounding them about where Uncle Jose was and when was he going to get up and can't we go up and see him.

Finally, around 3pm, my father-in-law would look at them and say, "It's about time he got up. Why don't you two go wake him up?" And, they'd be off like a shot. It sounded like a thundering herd of elephants going up those stairs and then they'd hit the bedroom door...bang, bang, bang..."UncleJose UncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJose..." After which, you'd here a noise, some response, something...but, heaven forbid he'd wait too long to respond with real words. They'd be at it again..."UncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJose UncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJose..." until he came out of the room and made his way downstairs. I don't think it ever took more than two rounds of "UncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJose
UncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJoseUncleJose..." to get him out of bed.

One particular afternoon, Jose was particularly tired and Marty and Joey were particularly loud and insistent. Once Jose made it downstairs, he was shaking his head. He looked at Vic and said, "Those kids of yours...**what cornfield did you get them from?" My husband just laughed and said, "What are you complaining about? We live with that every day."

I think from this day forth, in honor of Jose's memory, my children will be know as the Children of the Corn.


* Jose worked as a bail bondsman in addition to his full time job at Gregory Poole before his dystrophy got too bad.
**referring to Stephen King's Children of the Corn

Things I Learned In 2011

2011 was a wild, stressful, fabulous, and wonderful year and I'm still trying to figure out how it's over.

• I learned that a crocheted penis is one of the greatest ice breakers you can have with you at a conference for women. I heard "Oh My God, is that what I think it is? Can I take a picture?" more times than you can even imagine this past summer. I wonder if a crocheted boob would have the same impact...somehow I doubt it.
• I learned I can indulge my crafting habit, make some money and embarrass my oldest son all at the same time. Yes, I've made more Beanises since then and people are actually paying me for them.
• I've learned that someone very close to me is suffering from infertility and it makes me angry that I can't just snap my fingers or wiggle my nose and make it all better for her.
• I learned that I have both more patience than I ever imagined and, at the same time, far less patience than I imagined. My dear friend Rys and her family shared our house for about 3 1/2 months after their house was totaled by the Hurricane Irene floods. I love them dearly. I would open my house again to them in a heartbeat if they needed it...but, man oh man am I glad to have my space back. Honestly, I don't know how the Sister Wives make it work so seamlessly over such a long time because it is tough having that many people from two families under the same roof.
• I had it confirmed that my husband is a truly wonderful man. He didn't even blink when I talked to him about Rys and her family coming here and was truly amazing about having them here. I don't know many men who would willingly open their house for that extended period.
• I realized again that my kids rock. Bedroom switches were put on hold, space was given up, and, for the most part, toys and possessions were shared and they welcomed Rys and her family into our house.
• I've found out I absolutely adore my Nook. Yup, the Nook hits the top of my list for coolest pesents this year.
• I've learned that while the process of filing your eBooks onto shelves or organizing them by genre, author, etc isn't that complicated, it becomes infinitely more complex when you load 330+ files/books at once and have to categorize all of them at once. It took me 3 days, use of my Nook and my computer, and I still have 9 books somewhere on my Nook that have avoided being put on a shelf.
• I've learned that many editors do a half-assed no-assed job when it comes to editing books that are put out digitally. When an otherwise good book is interrupted by paragraphs that go from normal width and appearance to a tiny column that is so narrow that only THE or A is short enough to not be hyphenated, someone has NOT done there job.
• I also learned that Calibre is a life saver for anyone who owns an eReader. When you've bought a bunch of books for your Kindle app and then you've received a Nook for Christmas, it allows you to change formats so YOUR books can continue to be used on your new eReader.
• I've also found that Calibre saves you from the previously mentioned half-assed editing. It's a problem when you have a book named The Story of XYZ and some lazy assed so and so has embeded the file with the name Microsoft word File - T. That really becomes a problem when you have multiple files with that fucked up naming issue because that fucked up Microsoft Word name is what shows up when you unknowingly load the poorly named files onto your ereader. Then you have 10+ books that you can't tell the difference between until you run them through reformatting in Calibre.
• I've really learned to love my hair this year and want to know if I should keep it purple when I dye it again or if I should pick another Manic Panic shade.
• I've found out my middle son is turning into a huge football fan and a Steelers  fan at that. He wants a Polmalu jersey...which is kind of appropriate with the hair Joey has.
• I've learned that I still know more about computers than my children and that gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling.
• I've learned that my baby sister is a bit of a hard head and have to thank her for the Christmas miracle her hard-headedness brought about.
• I've learned that I'm not quite as resigned to never having a fourth child as I thought I was. I was hit with a serious case of baby lust and caught up in a bad case of regrets and what ifs when I found out a friend who was pregnant with her youngest daughter when I was briefly pregnant with Eva just gave birth to her third child, a beautiful little boy. Feeling I thought were long behind me reared their ugly head.
• I've learned that once again my husband has fallen on the crappy end of the medical odds and he is already dealing with diabetic neuropathy in his feet. Diabetes fucking SUCKS.
• I've learned (or re-learned) that I am truly blessed to be surrounded by a fabulous family and wonderful friends. We have a roof over our heads, food in our fridge, clothes on our backs, and my husband has a steady job with great benefits. I am blessed.

I hope each and every one of  you who take the time to stop by and read my blog realize just how important you are to me. While I do write for myself, I'd be lying if I said it wasn't pretty damned great to know there are people out there reading my words and caring about me. Y'all are fabulous. And, to my dear friends, the savvy women I treasure, my blogging and crafting sisters, I truly love each and every one of you. I hope you all had a fabulous Christmas (or whichever holiday you recognize) and I hope 2012 brings you happiness and your heart's desire.

Perfect Moment Monday: Happy Anniversary

Welcome to Perfect Moment Monday sponsored by Lori over at Write Mind Open Heart. Lori says that "Perfect Moment Monday is more about noticing a perfect moment than about creating one. Perfect moments can be momentous or ordinary or somewhere in between."

A week ago Saturday, Vic and I went out on a date. We actually got to go out and celebrate our anniversary. Now, for many people, this might not seem remarkable but with Vic's work schedule and the kid's schedules, it's a rare occasion that the money to go out and the time to go out actually coincide. We both got cleaned up...

excuse the goofy smile and closed eyes...my
camera sucked and this was the best picture I got

Then, we headed out for the night. We headed to The Hibernian and had a nice relaxing dinner. It was such a pleasant change of pace to not have to worry about feeding the kids or telling them to stop bugging each other. We both had a delicious dinner and I even had a drink.

An Orange Creamsicle with Peach Schnapps,
Whipped Cream Vodka, OJ, and Milk

Since Rys and her husband were watching the kids, we didn't have to worry about hurrying home. We were able to just hang out together after dinner. We went and wandered through a few stores, checked out a few places we'd been meaning to see, and truly got to enjoy each other's company. It was a rare pleasure and a truly perfect moment.







Go check out the other perfect moments at this month's Perfect Moment Monday on Write Mind Open Heart.

My Secret Girl Crush

When you blog about your family, there seem to be certain days you are almost obliged to blog about...birthdays, anniversaries, blogoversaries, and more. Monday was one of those days for me, my 17th wedding anniversary. I had really intended to write about my husband today but then I read something about Michelle Obama (thanks Reader's Digest) and decided I had to write about that instead. After all, my husband knows how madly in love with him I am...one blog post wouldn't make a difference. Sometimes, you just have to break protocol and write to the mood of the moment.

I know many of you have been reading this blog for a while and you know that I was solidly in Obama's camp during the last election. I have been sorely disappointed by many things that have happened during this administration but one thing I haven't been disappointed or disillusioned about is the character of the Obamas. I may disagree with many of their political actions but I truly admire them as people...and I kind of have a girl crush on Michelle Obama. She's smart, savvy, has a truly amazing sense of style, and supports causes that are near and dear to my heart. I love that she is such a strong supporter of military families. I absolutely LOVE that she shows girls and women that it's ok to be strong, opinionated, and independent and still be deeply in love with your partner.

I think my all time favorite quote from Michelle Obama has nothing to do with politics. Back in 2009, she was interviewed for Glamour magazine and she was talking about picking a partner. Mrs. Obama said

"Cute's good. But cute only lasts for so long, and then it's, Who are you as a person? That's the advice I would give to women: Don't look at the bankbook or the title. Look at the heart. Look at the soul. Look at how the guy treats his mother and what he says about women. How he acts with children he doesn't know. And more important, how does he treat you? You should never feel less than."

That really and truly says it all.I got lucky and found that all in one package...the heart, the soul, the charmer, and the looks (I love you Vic).

Who do you admire? Tell us a little about why they earned your admiration.

WDD: Help Beat The Bitch

6 years ago today, I was hugely pregnant with my miracle baby, a baby it had taken us many years and many losses to get to. A little less than 5 1/2 years ago today, our lives had changed in more than one way. That precious, amazing miracle was almost 4 months old and my husband was a newly diagnosed diabetic. To be honest, I'm not sure which event has changed our life more.

Prior to his diagnosis, Vic was in better health than he had been in a long while. He had lost almost 80 pounds. His blood pressure was fabulous. His cholesterol was at a level most athletes would be envious of. And, then came that *little phone call. "Mrs. Cruz, your husband's blood work came back and we need him to give us a call. His blood sugar is over 350." I don't have to tell you that is a phone call no one, let alone a hormonal, nursing mother, wants to get.

We both have a medical background. We've both been trained in advanced life support. We both know that while diabetes is a manageable disease, it can also wreak havoc with a person's life and health. From day one, Vic's diabetes was never easy to manage. Dietary changes helped some but not much. Each new combo of meds worked for a while but not for very long. Like most medical issues in our life, Vic's diabetes was outside the normal progression of the disease.

See, Vic was diagnosed with what is typically called Type II or (use to be called) Adult Onset Diabetes. If you talk to any expert in the disease, they will tell you that if a Type II diabetic lives long enough, they will eventually convert to an insulin dependent diabetic. The human body, when constantly exposed to medicines, can build up a tolerance to them. Depending on your unique biochemistry, it may take months or it may take years. Some people with Type II diabetes will hit on a medication combination and it will work for years and years. Others, like my husband, seem to be lucky enough to go through this at an accelerated pace. In the space of 3 years, Vic went from being newly diagnosed to his body saying "Fuck it all. You don't use the insulin I produce...well, I just won't produce it at all."

Because of the level of insulin resistance Vic started with, the insulin doses he takes are big enough to drop an elephant in it's tracks. And, those levels of insulin have a sneaky, nasty side effect. High insulin doses can and often do cause weight gain and that weight gain can cause the diabetes to be harder to control...rinse, lather, and repeat. Diabetes is a true and royal bitch...and, it's a bitch I want to see put down.

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Today is World Diabetes Day. It's a day to educate, raise awareness, and hopefully help fight for a cure. While most of us don't have the necessary degrees to do the research to find a cure, each and every one of us can help raise money to fight this bitch of a disease. If you have a moment, click on over to my friend Jen's blog. Jen's the mom to an amazing little girl named Lizzie and Lizzie is trying to raise $1000 to help fight juvenile diabetes. Lizzie is only $74 from her goal and nothing would make me happier than to see her make it. Not only would it bring a smile to the face of a friend, but it would be a step towards ending this bitch of a disease.

The Many Styles of Victor Cruz

The other night, I was in the bathroom giving Gabe a bath and Vic came into the bedroom to change his shirt. Right after he pulled the old shirt off I looked out and cracked up. T-shirt removal did a serious job on Vic's hair. See, my husband has decided that he needs to grow his hair out. I think he's having flashbacks to the 70s and earlier.

I call this the Nick Nolte mug shot look.

I was so amused by the first hair disaster that I broke out the brush and started playing with Vic's hair. I must say he was an extremely good sport and I was very amused by it all. Here are the many styles of Victor Cruz (with his permission)...

This is the Flock of Seagulls look.

The Sumo top knot

Sumo top knot side view.

But, then I decided the Sumo top knot was missing something. Hmmmm, what could it need? I think it needs chop sticks.

I'm still trying to convince him to wear the chopsticks to work. So, which hairstyle do you think is best for laughs?

The Knees Have It

In between our bouts of sniffing and sneezing and coughing and hacking, Rys and I have been kicking butt in the house cleaning department. One of the rooms we tackled was the den/playroom. There were a lot of toys that weren't being played with anymore and a bunch or broken ones mixed in too. We still have a bunch to do in the den but we have already donated 3 garbage bags of toys and threw away one other bag. I ran across a few things that brought back memories and made me wonder all at the same time.

See, back in August of 2001, Vic blew his left knee out. It was destroyed and required multiple surgeries to even make it functional. These multiple surgeries left a scar about 8 inches long on Vic's knee. Around this same time, Marty discovered Power Rangers and all the figurines and toys that went with them. Marty went through a stage where his Power Rangers were turning into casualties of war and the funny thing is that they all had the same injury.

See, you have 3 Power Rangers missing their left legs and on spare left leg missing a Power Ranger. Do you sense a theme here? Vic destroys his left knee and, shortly thereafter, Marty starts destroying the left legs of Power Rangers. All in all, it makes me seriously wonder about my oldest son's sanity and outlook on life.


Have you ever had things/toys get broken or destroyed in a weird manner?

Hell In A Handbasket part 2

As I briefly told you early, early this morning, my Thursday night went to hell in a handbasket. When Marty got home from school yesterday, he had some homework from his Honors Geometry class. Like all classes, the first unit is all about reviewing last years info which means he had Algebra homework. Now, what y'all have to understand is that Algebra is the bane of Marty's existence just like it was the bane of my existence when I was in middle school. The minute Marty has trouble with an Algebra problem, he gets frantic and becomes convinced he can't do it...just like I did back in the day. So, his homework was taking way too long, dinner wasn't getting cooked, and he was getting more and more frantic. Finally, dinner had to be had so I took Gabe and Joey with me to get pizza while Marty took a break from his Geometry homework and did his creative writing homework.

We got home with the pizza and the boys attacked the pizza. Little Gabey out ate both his big brothers that night...6 slices to Marty's 5 and Joey's 4 1/2. Once everyone was sated, Marty and I sat back down at the table to finish the work. We hadn't been there even 5 minutes when I heard a loud thump and Gabe started to wail. I looked over and Gabe was standing in the corner by the TV with his hand over his chin. Joey told me Gabe leaned forward off the ottoman to pick up something he dropped and he slipped and pitched chin first into te entertainment center. I called him over to comfort him and, once he was calmed down a bit, I asked him to let me check it out. I gently moved his hand back and the blood started flowing. It wasn't dripping. It was like someone had turned on a faucet. I yelled for one of the older boys to bring me a rag and slapped it over his chin and put pressure on it. When I thought the cut was just on the outside, I was prepared to hold pressure until the bleeding stopped and put some butterfly bandages on to hold it shut. But, as I'm holding Gabe and holding pressure, I noticed there was a fair amount of blood in the mouth too. So, I took a peek in without removing the pressure from the outer sore and can see a cut bleeding freely. My fear at that point was that his teeth had punctured his lip. That was it. I decided I had to take Gabe in. I couldn't look up the info I needed so I called Vic at work and asked him to check if any of the Urgent Care centers were still open. As I was talking to Vic, Gabe figured out I was going to take him to the doctor and he started wailing louder and louder. Despite the fact that it was only about 7, none of them were accepting any more patients for the night and that meant an ER trip for us. After I got off the phone with Vic, I had to calm down a frantic 5 yr old. Ever since Gabe had his back to school physicals, he has been quite vocal about how much he hates shots and never, ever wants to have another one. The pain of the injury plus the exhaustion from the first day of school plus the fear of needles made him almost inconsolable but we managed a brief state of calm. That calm was shattered once I got up and started moving him toward the door and the van. Gabe started fighting me tooth and nail and I knew there was no way to get Gabe to the hospital by myself while maintaining pressure on his cut. While I tried to calm (again) the wailing, screaming, and crying Gabe, Joey called Vic and told him I needed him to help us get to the ER. Gabe completely wore himself out and while we were waiting for Vic, Gabe fell asleep leaning back on my chest. He actually started snoring.

When Vic got home, Gabe woke up and started fretting again. His little power nap helped though and I was able to get him to listen. I promised him that the doctors would find the best and easiest way they could to take care of him. I told him that if we were lucky that the doctors might be able to glue his cut shut but I couldn't promise that. Well, the idea of gluing the cut shut must have sunk in. When we got to the ER, Gabe told the triage nurse he wanted it glued shut while she was checking and putting gauze over the gash.

He announced to the nurse who took us to a room that he was going to ask the doctor for no stitches, just glue and he perked up a little when she mentioned a popsicle when we were done.

Then, he asked the nurse and doctor assigned to him for glue, not stitches. All of the asking must have helped. Well, that and a little luck helped since the teeth cut deeply inside the mouth (but not all the way through) and the entertainment center cut deep outside the mouth (but not all the way through). This all meant they were able to glue the gash shut.

Gabe was a happy camper when they told him no shots or stitches but he still questioned them about anything that looked like it might be a syringe with a needle attached. Then he took a moment to show off his hospital bracelets.

I think it amused them a little bit. They also laughed a bit when Gabe made sure to remind them that he needed a popsicle when they were done taking care of him.

We got home from the ER between 10:30 and 10:45 and the younger two boys were in bed by a little after 11 pm. My night wasn't done though. I still had to help Marty with his math homework. The enforced break from math homework cause by Gabe's drama did have one benefit. Marty was no longer worked up and that meant he was actually able to understand the work and figure out what needed to be done. Even with that advantage, we still didn't get done with his work until well after midnight. I got a grand total of 4 hours of sleep last night and I am feeling it today.

50 cal, 357 magnum, 45...

in other words, Random Bullets...

• Came down to my parents on Monday so Gabe could join in swimming lessons and Joey could help out with them.
• Drove Marty home from my parents' house Tuesday night (got home at 11:30pm) so I could get him to church to leave for his 3 day volunteer trip at 8:15 this morning. The high school and middle school youth groups are doing volunteer work at a Lutheran Services for the Aging facility.
• After I dropped him off, I took a moment to go by Joey and Gabe's school to fill out the form to be an approved volunteer again this year. 
• Did I tell you Marty is going to be in the Naval ROTC program at his high school this year?
• OMFG, high school?!?!?! How did that happen?
• Gabe is swimming...not very far but he is swimming. Trip to parents' for swimming lessons SUCCESS
• Joey has been helping my mom teach swimming this week. He's also helped mow the lawn and clean up a rental house they own. He is definitely earning the moolah my mom promised him.
• Need to get home and sew. Have to finish a few things before I leave for BlogHer in a week...eeek, I'm so unprepared.
• I leave for BlogHer in a week...squeeeeeeeeeeeeee
• I'm traveling to BlogHer with two of my best friends in the whole wide world...can't wait!
• While in San Diego, I will get to see one of my best friends from college and meet his wife for the first time.
• I miss my husband when I'm not with him. I miss him right now.
• I should be in bed but I'm writing this and then I have a book calling my name.
• I may need a nap again tomorrow.

What's your week been like...random bullets please!

Kids Say The Darndest Things

My apologies to Bill Cosby and the people from ABC for ripping off their title but it's simply true. Kids do say the darndest things and kids are strange. Because they don't put the same limitations on themselves as adults do, they are much more willing to let their minds wander in ways we often don't. And, listening to little kids talk is simply fabulous. The combination of them just learning to express themselves plus just learning how to talk can create some wonderful ideas, funny pronunciations, and all around goodness. Here's a small collection of this wonderfulness from our house.

• Quote of the day from Gabe: "what if cat's had little cat trampolines and they could jump way up in the air?"
• According to Gabe, it's not Dracula. It's Draclea (pronounce with a long e). This goes along with ridiculous becoming ridicleeous and regular becoming regleear.
• When Joey was little, he thought all fast food was called McDonald's. One day he asked if we could go to Burger King to get McDonald's.
• Ever since Marty was little, the grocery store Food Lion has been referred to as the Lion Store.
• When Vic was a young child, he lived in Puerto Rico and his first language was Spanish. In Spanish, luna means moon. Vic thought that if martians came from Mars that lunatics must come from the moon.

Do you have any funny pronunciations, weird names, or just humorous things you (or your kids) said when you were little? And, tell me what you think would happen if cat's had cat trampolines? Please share.