who partnered with Miss W, her IM
They made me laugh 'til I cried
and my son nearly died*
all from a convo started on a whim
I know this isn't the best limerick around but I had to come up with a tribute to the wonderful, whacked out sense of humor possessed by my thug sista Kym. With loving tribute and the earnest desire to share the laughs, I now present the conversation that inspired this post (she blogged it here)...
Skype chat with Miss W, my intended mother**of embarassment
Miss W: I have a question for you.
Miss W: Do you think Hagrid is infertile?
Me: Hagrid as in Harry Potter Hagrid?
Miss W: Yes, that Hagrid. And isn't it sad? He works with children, uses (scary) animals as surrogate children...
Miss W: I mean...ok, if you cross species, say a horse and a donkey -- infertile mule. A lion and a tiger -- infertile liger. So a giant and a human...
Me: I wouldn't think so. I think that in the scope of the books, he didn't get the chance to have kids. I always imagined that after the big battle at Hogwarts, he and the Beaubatons' headmistress (whatever her name was) hooked up, got married, and had little giant babies, lol.
Miss W: I think Madame Maxine is the only person he could have ever married.
Miss W: Because um...I think he would have killed a human female if he had sex with her.
Miss W: Now my next question...
Me: well, maybe a muggle female. maybe a magic female could have magic wanded her vag: "VAGINUS MAXIMUS!"
Miss W: See, now you are going in the right direction with my next question. Hagrid's dad was a wizard. His mom a giant. HOW THE HELL DID THAT WORK?
Miss W: I mean, I suppose it's much better than the other way around.
Me: ERECTUS PENIUS MAXIMUS!
Miss W: OMG -- that is exactly what I thought! Some kind of engorgement charm. Otherwise? I think he was just off by himself wanking somewhere when a giantess picked him up and inserted him tampon style.
Me: I am seriously losing my shit laughing over here. HILARIOUS.
Miss W: haha
Me: I am sooooooooooooo blogging this.