"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Friday, December 10, 2010

The true story behind the angel on top of the tree

Today, I want to share with you the *true story of how it became tradition to have an angel on top of the Christmas tree.

The true story behind the angel on top of the tree or
How Saint Nick lost his Saint

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...wait a minute. That is DEFINITELY not the right story intro. Oh well, let me try again.

Hundreds and hundreds of years ago, Saint Nick was preparing for one of the first modern celebrations of Christmas. He had his elves hard at work building the presents for all the good little girls and boys. Mrs. St. Nick was working hard in the kitchen and Saint Nick, well, he was getting ready to put up the very first Christmas tree. Now, given that Christmas was a celebration of Jesus's birth, God decided he needed to send an angel down to supervise the prep work. He especially wanted his angel to watch over the decorating of the first Christmas tree since he knew it would forever after be a symbol of his son's day.

Now, sadly, history has lost the record of exactly which angel God sent down to help Saint Nick. Considering what happened, perhaps that is for the best.

Saint Nick was happily humming Christmas hymns while he was selecting decorations to put on the towering fir tree he had dragged into his living room. All of a sudden, he was blinded by a flash of light. When his eyes finally cleared, an angel, one of God's holiest messengers, was standing there. At first, Saint Nick was thrilled to have the advice of this angel. He wanted to make sure the tree was a proper tribute to the Christ child. Despite the positive start, the situation rapidly degenerated. Saint Nick would pick up a green ribbon. The angel would demand gold. Saint Nick would set the lights on the tree twinkling and the angel would demand he make then stop. E.V.E.R.Y. single thing Saint Nick chose would be contradicted by the angel. Yet, Saint Nick persevered and after hours and hours of aggravation he was almost done. All he had left to choose was a decoration for the top of the tree. Giving it much thought and much consideration, Saint Nick decided he should put a star on top of the first Christmas tree. After all, the three wise men were led to the baby Jesus by a star. What could be more perfect?

Well, that's all it took to set the angel off. From the angel's reaction, you would have thought Saint Nick's selection of a star was a personal affront to heaven itself. "A star doesn't have sufficient majesty. A star isn't what began the tale. We angels were present throughout the story of Jesus's birth." And it went on and on and on. Finally, Saint Nick had lost it. He looked straight at the angel and yelled, "Fine, you don't want my damn star. You think an angel is the only decoration that represents the majesty of this story. Then dammit, we'll put an angel on top of the tree." With that, Saint Nick grabbed the angel in one hand, the tree in the other, and he shoved the tree straight up the angel's ass.

Thus, the tradition of using an angel on top of tree began...and Saint Nick lost his right to be called Saint, forever after being called Santa Claus.



*at least the true story according to Vic

9 comments:

GeekByMarriage said...

Was set to hate it but OMG I'm glad I stuck it out to the end!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
snort

CreoleInDC said...

ROFL! Imma fight Vic!

AnotherDreamer said...

LMAO, wow!

Lori Lavender Luz said...

Talk about naughty!

Sandy said...

Hahahahaha! I like the way it starts off as one of those sweet "meaning of Christmas" stories.

Guess what? You won my book giveaway. YAY!!!

Alana said...

Hilarious! Gotta love Vic and his sense of humor, your story cracked me up!

Just read your last post...Your Joey is such a Sweetie. I'm sorry he is hurting.

battynurse said...

Lol. I agree with GeekbyMarriage. That's good.

..al said...

Yeah right - Kristin and especially Vic....LOL.

Kakunaa said...

LMAO. I love that. I may have to share that :)