"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Household Hints from Evil Mom: Tip 2

Welcome back to one of the newest features of my blog, Household Hints from Evil Mom. Last time, you learned about the many household uses of Wal-Mart brand peanut butter. Today, I'd like to share with you the many uses of Crest toothpaste.

Crest toothpaste is not limited to the roll of keeping your teeth sparkling and white...No, my dear friends, as Evil Mom and any college student will tell you, Crest toothpaste can be used to fill nail holes on the wall so you don't get charges for them when you move out. Also, with the many colors of Crest toothpaste available today, you could even go so far as to match the toothpaste with the paint. Just think, Cinnamon Crest can fill the nail holes on your red wallthe cool mint can fill the holes on your seafoam colored walland, the traditional white Crest can fill mail holes on any white wall in your houseBut, my dear friends, I want to let you in on a great big secret. This is something Evil Mom learned when she was 2 years old. The traditional blend of Crest toothpaste will remove paint. See, even when I was young, I assiduously searched for alternate uses for everyday items. Mini- Evil Mom and her best friend decided to redecorate my room while our moms had coffee together. We painted the walls and bed posts with an already opened tube of Crest. Aaaah, the swirls and streaks were a magnificent work of modern art. Sadly, my mom didn't see it in the same light. And, somehow, she seemed even more disturbed when she she wiped it off and the paint came off with it. I don't think she appreciated the opportunity to repaint the walls of my bedroom.

So dear friends, do you have any helpful hints for Evil Mom?


Kymberli said...

Puffing up giganto clouds of your infant sister's baby powder in effort to make your imaginary building-burning fire have realistic smoke will not make your mom proud that you know how to stop, drop, and roll and crawl on the floor to minimize smoke inhalation. The powder also does not sweep up easily from wood floors, either.

Another Dreamer said...

LOL, no but I love your Evil Mom stories ;)

JamericanSpice said...

I agree. Purple and gold is gorgeous!

That is so cool to learn about what toothpaste can do. Im just sharing on the phone with my bestie. lol

And gosh I laughed at the room paint thing!

I guess I must secure my toothpaste!

Strange Girl said...

Now I know to keep crest far, far away from my creative little boy. :D Thanks for that tip!

Anonymous said...

I used to have a friend in childhood who was plagued by cold sores. Her cure was toothpaste dabbed generously. She claimed toothpaste was the dry-all-evil on the skin, so she used it for zits, scratches, anything. Now, her cat loved the minty smell and taste of the toothpaste, so you can imagine the love at night, when the friend was in bed and the cat finally had access to the dried toothpaste. ;-)

I personally use toothpaste to give back some sparkle to the silver jewels. And you know what, it does work. But you really have to be thorough, otherwise you get silver rings and necklaces with white spots all over them...