A Better Place

Remember that everything old is new again at my self hosted blog of the same name...

The New Dragondreamer's Lair

I fought the lock and the lock won...

Check out my post about my super mom fail.

Sometimes People Do Change

Check it out...a little trip in the wayback machine...AND CHANGE YOUR LINKS

BlogHer’12 – Another Saturday Night

Head over to the REAL Dragondreamer's Lair and check out the last night of BlogHer.

PERFECTLY Simple™ by ZonePerfect®

Head on over to the new digs to read about the fabulous Perfectly Simple nutrition bars.

BlogHer’12 – Erotica, making it fit, and other adventures

Come read all about the fab adventures of Saturday at BlogHer'12.

Giving in to my Girly Nature

Check out my latest find from BlogHer'12. And, don't forget to change your bookmark.

BlogHer’12 – towering buildings, amazing words, and more

A little more of BlogHer'12 - scenery, shoe porn, fabulous words, and people...head on over.

With Rivet And Sway at BlogHer’12

Check out my review of my Rivet & Sway glasses...coupon code included.

BlogHer’12 – Memorials, Friends, and Parties

Lots o' pictures...lots o' fun. Head on over to the new place.

BlogHer’12 – New York Bound

Head over to the new place and check out my first BlogHer'12 post - BlogHer'12 - New York Bound - it includes an orgasm in a glass.

Happy BIrthday, Honey!

Please head over to the new digs and wish Vic a Happy Birthday.

Please add my new bloggy home to your blogroll, follow my feed, etc!

Super Secret Squirrel Shit

Click on through. I'm ready to let you in on the Super Secret Squirrel Shit that I've been working on.

Gonna Be "BlogHer Bound"

With apologies and thanks to Paul Simon...

BlogHer Bound 
scroll to the bottom to listen to the original

I'm sitting at my computer station.
Gotta get a ticket to my destination.
Checking out my facebook fans my laptop and iPhone in hand.
Finally, finally the trip is planned for this wordsmith, ain't life grand.
BlogHer bound,
I wish I was,
BlogHer bound,
BlogHer where my thought's escaping,
BlogHer where all the tweets are singing,
BlogHer where my friends are waiting
Impatiently for me.

Ev'ry day's an endless stream
Of tweets and pins and online zines.
And no blogs look the same to me, ingenuity despite the memes
And ev'ry friend I've never met reminds me that I long to be,
BlogHer bound,
I wish I was,
BlogHer bound,
BlogHer where my thought's escaping,
BlogHer where all the tweets are singing,
BlogHer where my friends are waiting
Impatiently for me.

Tonight I'll write a post again,
I'll play the game and pretend.
But all my words come back to me in shades of mediocrity
For writer's block attacks me, I need someone to inspire me.
BlogHer bound,
I wish I was,
BlogHer bound,
BlogHer where my thought's escaping,
BlogHer where all the tweets are singing,
BlogHer where my friends are waiting
Impatiently for me.
Impatiently for me.

Randomosity

• I'm wiped out...cried more today and last night than I have in a while. Seriously sucks having to take a beloved pet to be cremated.
• It's hardest when it's quiet. Joey dealt pretty well all day but, when night hit and the house quieted, the tears started to fall. He is so broken up about losing Butterball and it kills me that I can't make it better. I just hold him, stroke his back, cry with him, and talk.
• Remember that post about which glasses I should chose? I didn't get any of them. That's right. I went through all 1900+ pairs of glasses on the Zenni Optical site (LOVE Zenni) and didn't get any of them.
• I didn't get any of them because I scored 2 free pairs of glasses. The first pair was through an open facebook deal from Coastal.com All I paid for was shipping and handling. Their s&h cost as much as the glasses from Zenni would have cost but they will be here in time for BlogHer.
• I bought the Love in Brown Tortoiseshell from Coastal...

• I'll tell you a little more about the other glasses soon. If you want to see the frames I picked from check out this pic.
• In case I haven't mentioned it...I'M GOING TO BLOGHER12 IN NYC NEXT WEEK.
• I'm more than a little excited and a lot overwhelmed with everything I have left to do. Since the productivity of yesterday and today were shot to hell by the sudden loss of Butterball, I haven't dyed my hair. I haven't finished my crochet project. I haven't packed anything. I haven't been to the AT&T store to get a sim card for my beautiful new phone.
• Despite all this, I'm counting the days and hours until I leave. My soul will be fed by the very nature of this trip. I get to spend time with women I love learning about things I adore and that's just the conference. There are also parties and sightseeing and meals with friends and big metal chickens. I really need this.
• Speaking of phones, I NEED CONTACT INFO. If I've ever texted you, exchanged info with you, or you think I need to do one of those things, please email me your contact info (cell #, blog url, email addy, even your home phone # and addy if you want). Send the email to cruzowlpost at att dot net

What random is going on in your life?

And then, his heart broke.

Yesterday, Joey's kitty, Butterball, passed away. About a week ago, my friend had noticed a small bump on Butter. Honestly, we didn't think it was anything serious (at least mot imminently serious) because Butter was a thin kitty...always had been...so you could tell if he ate a large meal. I was keeping an eye on him and Butter was acting normal. He was running to get canned food. On Monday and Tuesday, Butter was trying to steal Joey's dinner. He was acting like a normal kitty.

Then, yesterday morning after Joey left for his friend's house, I glanced over at Butter and the lump was visible and it was big. My first thought was "Oh God, if it's growing that fast, it has to be cancer." I didn't think we would have long but I was thinking in terms of days or weeks...not hours. Butter was still acting normal at that point.

By the time Joey got home, I could tell Butter didn't feel good but he didn't seem to be in pain. Joey immediately noticed the lump and I was faced with telling him I didn't think his kitty was going to make it. I explained that I thought it was cancer and told Joey that if I thought there was anything a vet could do that I'd find the money to pay for it. This was when Joey both impressed me and it broke my heart. Through his tears, Joey said "Can we take him in anyway? If they can't do anything and they tell us that he's in pain, it wouldn't be right to make him suffer. But mom, if they have to put him down, can you be in there with him? I don't want him to be alone but I don't think I can do it." Of course, I assured him I would be with Butterball.

Sadly, before we could leave, Butterball had a seizure. I bundled him up and we headed for the van. Luckily, Butter was calm at this point. Sadly though, Butter died in Joey's arms before we could even leave the driveway.

My heart is just breaking for my poor, sweet, kind-hearted boy. I wish I could take away the pain.

HELP please...

Y'all, I need your help. My beloved crackberry is missing in my house. I KNOW without a doubt it is here. One evening I had it out checking contact info, the next morning it was no where to be found. The battery is dead so I can't call it. This means all the phone numbers I had for texting, contacting at conferences, etc are temporarily gone. This is the sad, sad news.

The good news is that one of these little beauties is now in my possession and will be fully activated by the end of the week...in time for BlogHer. However, that means I need your contact info again. So, if you know I had your contact info, want me to have your contact info, or just want to say hi, please email me at cruzowlpost at att dot net (replace at and dot with appropriate symbols). Feel free to include home phone, address, blog url, etc along with that all important cell phone #. I, of course, will email you all my contact info back.

Simply Happy...

My boy, my oldest will be home tomorrow evening. He's spent the past week immersed in friends, church and doing good. I missed the hell out of him and can't wait to see him.

I'm hoping he remembered to use the camera he took with him. I really want to see some pictures. I also can't wait to hear all the stories although I imagine that will have to wait until Tuesday at least. I imagine he's going to crash and burn from exhaustion tomorrow evening.

But, right now I'm simply happy he's coming home.

The Pinterest Paradox

That sucking sound you heard...that was me getting caught in the Pinterest blackhole this week. It's dangerous because you have the illusion of getting things done...ideas percolate, taste buds are titillated, and you see so much beauty...when in reality, you lose a ton of time. Now, I'm not saying Pinterest isn't the awesomesauce (it is) but I am saying it's an great place to go intending to spend a little time looking and all of a sudden you are questioning where the hell your whole day has gone. Seriously, therein lies the Pinterest Paradox...you swear you've only looked for a little while but an unbelievable amount of time has passed.

That said, I have to share some of my favorite Pins this week...

 

This Baked Garlic Brown Sugar Chicken makes me drool just looking at it.

 

A double dose of eye candy...a gorgeous body adorned with a fab tattoo.

 

I'd like this dragon to sit on my dresser.

 

This made me laugh out loud. I adore Martha Stuart and can't wait to hear her speak at BlogHer but this is funny shit.

 

What woman doesn't like bling? Dragon bling is a plus in my book.  

Love this top even though I think it would make my hips look even bigger.

 

Something else that makes me drool just looking at it...yum.

Have you seen anything to titillate your eyes or tempt the taste buds? Share with me. You know you wanna!

The eyes are not responsible...

"The eyes are not responsible when the mind does the seeing. "
                                                                     ~ Publilius Syrus

Despite the fact that I like to think I see with my mind, I do need the vision my eyes provide too. And, I have just enough inherent vanity that I'd like them to look good while they do their job. So, help a lady out and tell me which 2 pairs of glasses you like the best. Please ignore the total lack of makeup and my messy hair.

Pair 1..........Pair 2

Pair 3..........Pair 4

Pair 5

Which 2 pairs of glasses do you like the best?


Thanks in advance for your help.

The Windex Warrior Take 2

Photo Credit: asobitsuchiya via Flickr

The invasion has returned. Yes, the fucking ants are back. And yeah, I still hate ants. Nothing creeps me out quite as much as seeing ants crawling across any part of my kitchen. I have been obsessive about keeping things cleaned up in my kitchen because I really hoped that my initial victory over the ants meant they were gone for the summer. I was delusional.

Not only are the ants back but I found out they are addicted to more than Fig Newtons. While Fig Newtons may be crack for the ant set, cereal is evidently like pot for the ant set. It seems to make them hungrier and hungrier...to the point where they got into sealed bags and boxes of cereal. I had to throw out a box of beignet mix and over half the cereal we had in our house.

This pissed me off. This pushed me over the edge. This time those ants fucking broke me. Windex was just not enough. I broke out the big guns. I went for the ant killer. I try really hard not to use anything toxic in the kitchen area because that means that everything that was already cleaned has to be scrubbed down again to get rid of the chemicals. I have to admit that there was a deep visceral satisfaction in stopping those fuckers ants in their tracks and knowing that I was creating an impenetrable barrier to those creepy crawlies. Now, I'm not deluding myself this time. As long as it's hotter than Hades here in the South, those 6 legged bastards will keep coming.

But, from now on, I'm armed with weapons of ant destruction. Game on bastards.

Y'all, I'm in Heaven...

I have discovered the site every shoe addict dreams of. This site is called Shoes of Prey and it makes me want to rush out and bust the entire budget on SHOES. This site lets you customize everything from the color to the type of leather to the heel height, to other details. It is fabulous.

This is the shoe that caught my attention in an ad...

and those were enough to send my shoe addiction into overdrive. But, when I headed over to the site and discovered the customizable feature, well, I couldn't resist. This is what I came up with...

Sadly, these shoes will have to remain a dream because they are too far out of this woman's budget. Until I win the lottery or discover a sugar daddy who wants to feed my shoe habit, I'll just have to dream.

What would you indulge in if money wasn't an issue? What is on your lottery list?

My 6:30 Wake Up Call

At 6:30 this morning, Marty, the other kids from our church, and the kids from St. Paul's Lutheran Church climbed on the bus and headed out on their adventure. While in NOLA, they will participate in a day of service, be involved in a scavenger hunt, and be involved in a 36,000 strong, youth led worship service that will be live streamed so everyone at home can see it. It should be the experience of a lifetime.

Despite the fact that he'll be two days travel away, I didn't hesitate to give my approval when he asked to go. Marty and our youth leaders have my utmost trust and faith. I have no doubt this will be a phenomenal experience that will allow him to grow emotionally and spiritually.

Even knowing all this, I felt a pang as I drove away from the church. All I could think about was that in three short years, Vic and I will be driving away after we drop him off for his freshman year of college. I'm not sure I'm ready for that.

Even though Marty's got almost 7 inches on me and he sports a visible mustache, he is still my little boy. I have trouble conceptualizing a world where he's not around every day. I found myself turning to call to him a number of times today only to stop and remember that he's not here. I guess it's a small taste of what it will be like when he actually does leave home.

I'm not entirely sure why this trip is impacting me in such a different way than previous trips have. Maybe it's because of the distance he is traveling. Maybe it's the fact that he is doing this without any family member being with him. No matter what the reason is, Marty's departure this morning was a major wake up call for me. My little boy is all grown up and it's time for me to start letting go.

Second verse, same as the first...

Busy, busy, busy...

Hey y'all...I'm completely immersed in last minute preparations for Marty's youth group trip to New Orleans. They leave at ohdarkthirty tomorrow morning and I have one more thing to get in his bag (damn that button for popping off in the wash).

And, say a prayer to the Gods and maybe the little blue men that I find my cell phone. I know it's in the house but the battery is dead so I can't call it and follow the ring to it's location.

Be back tomorrow with a real post.

Don't forget to enter my Wholly Guacamole giveaway.

It Brought On Delusions

The other day, Vic and I were watching The Travel Channel. We stumbled across a show all about State Fair Foods and got sucked in by all the artery clogging fried food goodness. You would think this would be something safe to sit in front of and brainlessly veg. You'd be wrong.

Instead of sitting there and being brainless, I started getting inspiration for better versions of the foods and desserts they were talking about...less frying, more goodness. I think I was having delusions of being a food blogger or something. My brain was thinking of things like pumpkin mousse ice cream, homemade ginger snaps, and other goodness. I got ideas for original recipes and they are plaguing my brain and begging to be made.

I'm trying to convince myself that these food projects can wait until after BlogHer (O.M.G. I'm leaving for BlogHer in only 16 days). I really need to convince myself that these new food projects need to wait because I have a ton of other things I HAVE to complete before BlogHer. I've got crochet projects that must be completed. I have to perfect and make at least one Gay Pride Oreo. I've decided that this dream MUST become real. I also have to make a birthday cake with Vanilla Bean frosting that I'm bringing to BlogHer for a very special friend. Birthday party in my room on Wednesday, August 1st. Somewhere in there I also have to take care of my kids, pack my bags for BlogHer, and start on a few household projects that MUST be done this summer.

Yeah, I really do have to wait for my side trip into food blogging that was inspired by (but will be so much better than) Fair Food. I'm going to be lucky to hold onto my sanity with everything else I have going on.

What do you have planned for the next couple of weeks? Share please.

Wholly Guacamole

Y'all, I've met many wonderful people and  thave been involved in amazing things all because of the connections I've made through blogging. One of the yummiest things that's happened to me was the fabulous thank you gift Wholly Guacamole sent me to say thank you for being part of their Guac Squad and for making sure my contact info was updated.

I was shocked when this cooler showed up on my doorstep and was thrilled when I opened it and found it packed with Wholly Guacamole products.

Honestly, I'm not sure what I like more...the guacamole or the salsa from their brand new salsa line. Marty and I inhaled the package of spicy guacamole and the classic guacamole is almost as good. I think Wholly Guacamole has ruined me for all other guacamoles. It has the perfect blend of spices. No one would ever accuse this guac of being bland. But, some of the salsa went even faster than the guac did. The Pineapple Salsa was to die for and the Red Pepper Mango Salsa was a close second. Oh my God were they ever good.

The coolest thing is that Wholly Guacamole didn't want anything in return for this gift. They did say that if I wanted to write about the gift, I could host a giveaway and they would provide a similar package to the winner. My package contained 6 salsas, 2 of the Guac snack packs, the Wholly Avocado chunky dip, two avocado stress balls, and a chip clip. I even saved the styrofoam cooler because it's a great size to use when you're bringing stuff home from the grocery store on a hot summer day. I couldn't pass up the opportunity to give one of you a similar goodie package. Click through and enter via the Rafflecopter form below.

Be scared...she came with gifts

I love my mom. I really do. She's a truly fabulous person, hella fun to have around, and my kids have a blast with her. I think I have the best mom in the world...except when she brings my youngest two boys farting slime.

It looks innocuous enough but don't let the bright colors and promises of fun suck you in. Flarp /Noise Putty/Fart Slime (whatever you call it) is a toy created by the devil himself...or maybe by a Grandma looking to pay back her kid for year of torture.

My first nightmarish experience with it was on our road trip to Georgia a few years back when she bought some of it to entertain the kids in the van. Imagine mile upon mile upon mile of brrraaaaappppp, eeeeew you stink followed by the insane laughter of the warped shorties in the back seat. It was crazy making. Then, it got spilled on the seat and some brainiac covered it with napkins instead of cleaning it up. It clung to that seat like crazy clings to Charlie Sheen. It took years before I was able to peel that hell born slime from the van seat.

My mom showed up today with two containers of this brightly colored torture device. Gabe and Joey spent hours making it make farting noises as loudly as they could. They were driving Marty, me, and the pets crazy. I finally snapped.

*ring, ring* my dad picks up the phone

Hi Kris, how is everyone?

Do you KNOW what your wife brought my younger children?  She bought them farting slime. I hate that stuff and she knows it. It took me years to get it off the seat in the van. I'm saving it. I'm making sure it stays in good fart making condition until Mom picks them up on Sunday. They are both bringing it with them and have instructions to play with it the whole way down to your house.

You wouldn't do that to me, would you?

No Dad, you I will give ear plugs. Your wife gets to suffer.

It's a good thing I love my mom and value our family holidays together or I'd be giving my parents a copy of Chicken Limbo to keep at their house for the grandkids next Christmas.

What's something a family member loves that you hate with an unreasonable passion?

Things I'm Afraid to Tell You

I think of myself as a naked blogger...not that I sit around in the nude and blog, but I think of myself as hiding nothing. And, that's mostly true.

But, when I'm honest with myself, I admit there are things I've never quite fessed up to or mentioned around here. So, when I ran across the post Things I'm Afraid To Tell You over at Sluiter Nation, I was intrigued. After reading Kate's post and following the links to the original post at Makeunder My Life, the post by Ez at Creature Comforts, and the coverage at HuffPo, I decided I needed to join the movement.

So, my lovely friends, readers, and commenters, y'all are going to get a chance to peer into the dark recesses of my mind. Hopefully, I won't scare anyone too much.

1. I'm a sucky housekeeper...really. I love having a clean house and, once it's clean, I can keep it that way but I SUCK at motivating myself to get things done. Sure, I do dishes. I wash clothes. I clean nastiness. I keep our house a safe place to live and grow up in but I am really, really bad about putting things away. I have piles of thing...neat piles but piles nonetheless. I don't vacuum as often as I should. I still have boxes in my closet and the corner of my room from when we moved in years ago. I justify it by saying I maintain my sanity by writing my blog and doing my crafts but the real truth is I HATE cleaning and avoid it if I can.
2. I have a major fear of failure...I always have...to the point where I avoid doing some things because I'm afraid I won't do them well. It's funny because it's not that I care what other people think. It's all on me.
3. Sometimes, I do things just because I know it will drive my kids crazy. I know it's not the nicest way to behave but it's funny as hell and it makes me laughhttp://www.blogger.com/blogger.g?blogID=8678310#editor/target=post;postID=3118424626629283603.
4. I both don't give a damn what people think about me and have an almost desperate need to belong. It all goes back to the bullying and teasing and feeling like an outsider when I was younger.
5. I went through sorority rush in college and didn't get in anywhere. Most days, that doesn't matter but when that insecure girl who lives deep inside of me peeks out, I still wonder why none of them wanted me in their group.
6. I am a major procrastinator. Sometimes it goes to such an extreme that I end up scrambling to complete something I've committed to.
7. Gabe has learned to floss regularly despite the fact that I set a sucky example with flossing. I brush my teeth religiously but flossing doesn't happen all that often.
8. We've been through a bankruptcy. My husband blew out his knee when he was on the job as a firefighter and, even though we were on workman's comp, we lost 33% of his income over night. We did everything we could and we still couldn't save our house.

Gulp, hope I didn't scare anyone off with these things I was afraid to tell you (well, more things I just don't really talk about). If any of you are brave enough to join in, I'll maintain a list here. I really hope to have some company because this is actually liberating.

Participants

JHL at A Half Baked Life
Pomegranate Smith at Too Many Fish to Fry

What The Fuck Wednesday: Are you a man or a mouse?

Welcome one, welcome all! Welcome back to What The Fuck Wednesday, the prime location to read about products, items, and events that make your head snap around and your mouth utter the phrase "What the fuck is that?"

My kids are such typical boys.They love shows where people crash and burn. They love to watch slapstick humor. In other words, shows like Wipeout with the big red balls are perfect for them. To keep peace in the house, I suck it up and sit through them. In a truly serendipitous moment, my suffering through Wipeout paid off with this week's What The Fuck Wednesday moment. Wipeout was doing a salute to the military and this meant there was lots of really nice eye candy on display. One guy showed promise as he started to get ready for his run through the Wipeout obstacle course but, once he was completely ready, he lost his allure. Somehow, sexy military man + speedo decorated like a mouse = a true What The Fuck moment. Tell me what you think...

Somehow, I just can't get past that mouse. "What The Fuck was he thinking?" keeps running through my head.


What's the best/funniest/weirdest/most jaw dropping What The Fuck moment you've been privvy to lately?

My Favorite Kind of Literary Insanity

Since I got my Nook, I've been reading voraciously and I've discovered many new authors I like. One of my favorite new discovers is John Carroll. John Carroll's stories are quirky, warped, and often more than a little demented. I love them.

My favorite find from Carroll is his short story The Emo Bunny that Should: A story for Demented Children. The story description says...

Emo the Bunny was a sad bunny. He preferred gloomy days, walks over a cliff and misery of any sort. One day he saw something very unusual. Normally he'd take a nap and try to forget about it, but for some reason he took an interest.

Ducks, bunnies, chickens, squirrels, geese, bears, cows, robins and The Easter Bunny all play a part in the disturbing events which show that woodland creatures aren't always as cute, fuzzy and innocent as they lead us to believe!

Caution: This story is not for normal children. If you have any intention of raising a well adjusted child, this is not the right tale for you.

Honestly, this description doesn't do The Emo Bunny that Should justice. It's bizarre, warped, twisted and funny as hell. Emo Bunny had me laughing out loud and made me want to seek out some of the other things John Carroll has written. And, this little gem of a story appeals to all ages. I loved it and so did my two oldest sons (14 and 10 when they read it).

Now, I know not everyone shares my warped and twisted sense of humor. So, I guess not every single one of you will like this book. But, if you like things like Mad (both the late night sketch comedy and the magazine) and In Living Color (the sketch comedy show that launched the Wayans and Jim Carrey), you will LOVE this story. The one thing I can guarantee is that you'll never look at the Easter Bunny the same way again.


*I received nothing for this review. I acquired the book on my own.

The day I was one of the idiots...

When Gabe was really little, he loved to play with the phone. And, like most kids, there was no faking him out with a pretend phone. It was the real one or nothing. I knew I shouldn't let him do it, but he was just too damned cute with that phone. I used to joke around and tell Vic that it was a good thing had Vonage or we'd end up opening our monthly bill and discovering we had a gazillion dollar charge for the day he dialed BFE or outer Mongolia. One day, he actually managed to dial some number combination that got us a prerecorded message in Spanish. Laughed my ass off about that one.

There was one call he managed to make that made me want to slink away into a corner and hide. One day when he wasn't even 1 1/2, Gabe managed to call 911....and, he didn't just call 911...he called 911, kept the line open, and then dropped the phone somewhere. Like most days at my house, it was loud, noisy, and chaotic. I had no clue he had done this and was totally confused about why there suddenly cops at my door. I totally gave them the dog-face confused look...you know, head cocked, aroooo?, and a very puzzled look on your face...when they asked if I'd called 911 but we all had a light bulb moment when Gabe came tearing ass around the corner, phone in hand, pushing buttons. I was mortified that we had dragged them out for nothing.

I really felt like one of the idiots that day. See, I firmly believe, the idiots of this world are the ones  who keep my husband gainfully employed. This isn't a slam against Vic or any other of the fine people who work as dispatchers. It's just an observation of the truth. Vic has been dispatching either part-time or full time for almost 20 years. Here's a small sampling of the more asinine things people have called him about...

• Yeah, I know they're saying on the TV that if you don't have to go out you shouldn't and it's too icy to drive but I don't have any [insert bread, milk, wine, beer, etc]. Is it safe for me to go to the grocery store? REALLY?!?!?!? *headdesk*
• When does the Carolina (aka UNC Tarholes) game let out? Yeah, that's the real role of the 911 dispatchers, entertainment coordinators.
• I'm going on a road trip. What are the driving conditions in DC? Come on people...we live in fucking NORTH CAROLINA...the 911 dispatchers don't psychically know what the roads are like over 250 miles away.
• What's the weather going to be like tomorrow? Have you heard of watching the fucking news?

The sad thing is that I can match these story for story with tales from my days as a paramedic. The general public has a total lack of common sense these days. Years later, I still laugh my ass off about some of the idiots who called us...and, if you ask pretty please, maybe I'll share some of the best stories with you.

Anyone out there want to fess up about a time that you were one of the idiots? Pleeeeeaaaaaassssseeee!

Home of the Knob Conqueror and more

• Joey's home and he had a great time. They climbed Raven's Knob and all the first year scouts got their picture taken on the top.
• Joey's camera was acting up a bit so I'll have to get a picture from someone else.
• Gabe is so thrilled to have Joey home and this means he's being wild and crazy.
• Unfortunately since Joey's been away, Gabe's nonsense which would have driven him crazy, he now thinks is hilarious. This just encourages Gabe.
• Joey just got home and, in only 10 days, Marty leaves for a week...going to NOLA for the national Lutheran Youth Gathering.
• Gabe fell asleep leaning against Jennifer at just past 7. It was so cute.

• Did you know that today's stardate is 11207.07?
• I think I forgot to tell y'all that I won tickets to the BlogWorld New Media Expo in Las Vegas in January. I didn't think I would be able to go. I was resigned to selling my ticket. But, super secret negotiations are going on and I'll probably be able to go. And, I'll be staying at the Rio...

• I've discovered one thing that really ticks me off about my Nook. When someone (me) is stoopid and lets the battery die, those almost 300 books that are loaded on the SD card instead of the physical memory of the Nook disappear off the shelves. They are still on the card but all the categorization, all the time spent shelving them, is fucking GONE! ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
• It's almost midnight and still about 85 degrees. If I get my shit together, I'm going to bake cookies in my van tomorrow.This damned heat has got to be good for something.
• We had milkshakes for dessert tonight (thanks for the idea Joey). Here's the recipe...

Mint Chocolate Chip Milkshakes with Oreos
3 large scoops of mint chocolate chip ice cream
3 oreos
1/2 cup of milk

1. crush the oreos in blender/food processor
2. add ice cream and milk to the cookies
3. mix and enjoy

PS...this was all done with my hand powered
food processor since my blender died

Conquering the Knob

For all of you who clicked through, I knew that title was just off enough to catch your interest.

The first year scouts from Joey's troop on their way to conquering Raven's Knob.

Joey's troop has been fabulous about keeping us appraised about how everything is going but, I have to admit, I really miss my kiddo. So glad he'll be home tomorrow.

Not what I planned...

I had another post planned.

But, I went on Facebook and found out the fabulous, bad ass, amazing Nancy has died.

And, then I when I was scrolling through my blogroll to find Nancy's blog links, I saw a post from Eden that went up earlier today. Her step-father, Jim is fighting a losing battle against cancer.

It's too much y'all.

Too much sadness.

Too much loss.

My heart is breaking for them.

If you know them, go offer support.

If you don't, please say a prayer.

And, take a minute to hug the ones you love.

What The Fuck Wednesday: Ninja Time

Welcome one, welcome all! Welcome back to What The Fuck Wednesday, the prime location to read about products, items, and events that make your head snap around and your mouth utter the phrase "What the fuck is that?"

If you're anything like me, you rarely pay attention to the ads on facebook. But, sometimes something will reach out and grab my attention. It's like getting a bitch slap from facebook. That happened over the weekend. I was quite innocently reading through a few of the group boards I belong to and then I saw it. I was laughing so hard the kids all had to come see what I was laughing at...

I guess the brains behind the Poop like a Ninja ad campaign did a fabulous job because I have an insane urge to go out and buy a bunch of Clorox Toilet Mint. I do live in a house full of males, after all.

Despite the genius of this ad campaign, I still have to say "What The Fuck (in this case) were they smoking when they came up with this?"

What made you say What The Fuck recently? Was it weird, gross, or just out there? Share it!

Happy 4th!

I hope your day is filled with as much love and laughter as my family always shares on holidays. Happy 4th!

Chocolate's a vegetable, isn't it?

My sun baked brain refuses to come up with a suitable blog topic. Seriously, Gabe and I spent 5+ hours at the pool today with my dear sister/friend Rys and her kids. It was a godsend because Gabe has been much needier and demanding with Joey away at camp. I don't think I realized just what a good job Joey does keeping Gabe occupied. But, those 5+ hours in the sun have fried my brain cells and they refuse to function.

photo credit: Edward Allen L Lim

I've also realized that spending so many hours outdoors is seriously detrimental to my desire to cook or even eat a decent meal. I started thinking and said "Hmmm, Vic cooked ribs last night. Ribs could be our protein....and, ICE CREAM...yeah, that sounds like a fab idea. Ice Cream will provide dairy and, if I make banana splits, then the kids also get fruit (bananas and cherries). Hey, doesn't chocolate (hot fudge) come from a bean. That counts as a vegetable." So, ribs...just ribs... for dinner and banana splits for dessert. Guess it's a damn good thing I rarely spend 5+ hours straight in the pool, in the sun, in 95+ degree weather.

Come on, help me out here. Someone else please fess up to doing something like this at least once in your life. Help a sister out, won't you?

Is it as good today as it was yesterday?

There are so many things from our childhood that we have fond memories of...so many things from when we were 5 or 10 or 15 that we look back at and smile. But, so often, those events or books or foods don't hold up to the test of time. Our tastes change. Our desires change. We change and simply don't find the same pleasures in things that we liked when we were younger.

Every so often, we rediscover something from our youth and, not only is it good but it is as good as we remembered.  Just this past week, I went on an Anne McCaffrey reading binge. As much as I love her Dragonriders of Pern books, the ones I really wanted to reread were some books I first read back in high school, her Crystal Singer books. To my delight, they were just as good as when I first read them.

It was so much fun sitting down with The Crystal Singer and Killashandra. I think part of the reason I loved those books so much is that the heroine was a strong but flawed person...she lived this amazing life but she sacrificed for the amazing. When I finished Killashandra, I went online to get links to the books so I could add them to my book challenge list.I was shocked and thrilled to discover that there was a third book in the Crystal

Singer series. This was like a little gift from the universe because, after Anne McCaffrey died late last year, I never expected there to be more books from her that I didn't know about.

I had to have the third book and I had to have it immediately. Crystal Line was a wonderful addition to the series. Even reading it for the first time through adult eyes, I got sucked into the story just as much as I did the first time I read the other two books. I'm so glad I reread the first two books and to have them topped off by the third book made it amazing. The whole series truly did stand up to the test of time.

Have you revisited anything from your childhood? Did it stand the test of time or did it fall short?

There Really Is A Little Boy In There

Sometimes it's easy to forget there is really a little boy in there...especially when your kiddo is big for his age. I had a reminder today how much Joey really still needs me.

Today, Joey's Boy Scout troop left for summer camp. It's his first long camping trip with the troop. Sure, there have been a bunch of weekend camping trips but this is the first one that lasts more than two days. Joey has been really looking forward to this trip. He has been so excited about it...talking about the hiking...looking forward to the swimming. Hell, he even started gathering stuff from the packing list by himself. I honestly wasn't anticipating any problems.

But, when I went in to wake him up this morning, he started moaning about how he didn't want to go anymore. He was saying he didn't think it would be fun. This shocked the hell out of me. Sure, before he bridged up to Boy Scouts, Joey expressed concern about camping without me but, once he was in the troop, he loved every minute of it. I thought we weren't going to have to worry about insecurity and homesickness. I was wrong.

I tried explaining to Joey that it was normal to be nervous. He promptly denied being nervous at all. He just said he didn't think it would be fun and what if he didn't like the activities and it had nothing to do with nervousness. Yeah, sure. I did give up on that discussion. I simply told him that the troop had paid for him to go and that meant he was obligated to go. We were not going to waste the troop funds that they graciously helped us out with. Joey was almost near tears and I felt like a total heel insisting he had to go. But, if I gave in, he wouldn't learn anything...he wouldn't grow...he wouldn't develop independence. But, I still felt like shit because I could tell how nervous he was.

Luckily, Gabe came to the rescue. Gabe was drawing funny pictures and ended up totally cracking Joey up. I suggested Joey take one of the pictures with him and, if he wasn't having a good time, all he would have to do is look at the picture and he'd start laughing. Joey asked Gabe if he could take the picture with him and Gabe was thrilled with the idea.

Once Joey had the picture in hand and he figured out I wasn't going to give in, he turned himself around and seemed eager to go again. He jumped right into the thick of it once we got to the meeting point and there were definitely plenty of boys for him to have fun with.

Do me a favor and keep your fingers crossed that he has a good time this week. I want this to be a wonderful experience for my not-so-little little boy.

That's What She Said...

In the first That's What S/He Said post, I promised you two funny stories. Here's number two...

Every now and then, you meet someone you instantly connect with, someone you know has the potential to be a lifelong friend. I was lucky enough to have that happen. In addition to all the amazing women I met (really, I don't want to name names...I'm terrified of forgetting someone), I met one woman who qualifies as a soul sister. It's a good thing Adrianna is amazing otherwise I might just have to hate her. She is gorgeous, skinny, smart, and a full out geek.

The fabulous Adrianna and me

As much as I adore her, Adri is the subject of this That's What She Said story. I have to tell it because it is something I could do...a slip of tongue exactly like what's happened to me.

Remember how I mentioned that I was in information overload? Well, Adri was suffering from the same thing. Only when Adri deals with information overload, she tends to drop off in the middle of conversations or sentences and move on to something new. Adri was telling a group of us how this amazing blogger/photographer (lets call her H) had offered to shoot head shots for anyone who wanted them done for only $50. Adri said something along the lines of "You should see the pictures she took of me. H gave me such good head....." and then she turned and started another conversation.

I couldn't help it. I started giggling. I knew she meant head shots but she said head. Adri gave me this look like what the hell are you laughing about and I asked her if she even realized what she said. Of course, she said no and I filled her in. It amused me so greatly that I proceeded to tell the story to everyone.

On the way home from dinner that night, we ran into Anissa and I told her the story. I knew she'd appreciate it. And, in classic Anissa style, she announced "That's what we need. We need to print t-shirts that say 'I got good head from H at Type-A Con 2012." Hmmmmmm, wonder what one of those t-shirts would go for?

Please share a story or a laugh or something. It's much more fun to laugh along with someone.

First in, Last out...

There are so many reason that Type-A Con rocked my world and one of them is I finally got some really good pics of myself. See, I'm usually the one behind the camera or the one sketching and drawing. I rarely have the camera pointed at me unless I'm doing a self portrait.

The first caricature drawn by the fabulous artist, Bat Hilliard, hired by ShotAtLife

Photo take by the amazing and beautiful Sarah of Water Water Everywhere

The very last photo taken by the photo booth at the Ubisoft 80s dance party

I am so thrilled to have these pictures as a way to remember Type-A Con. Do you have any favorite pictures you'd like to share?

That's what S/He Said...

Y'all, ever heard a story so funny you laughed until you cried? I know I certainly have. I have not one, but two laugh outloud stories about TypeACon. Interestingly, both stories at least peripherally involve Anissa Mayhew. By that measure (and many others), it was a totally kick ass conference.

Story 1

One afternoon, I was coming up the escalator and who should I see near the top but Anissa and her posse. The only two I can swear to being there were Anissa and Charlie Capen, the amazing writer from How To Be A Dad and at least occasional columnist at HuffPo. There were at least 3 other people there but the hilarity erased their names from my brain. I'm sorry. As I step off the escalator, I hear Charlie saying something that sounds vaguely like dinosaur names but isn't which totally cracked me up because of Gabe's history. I briefly mentioned this link to Charlie and the nameless (not really but, once again, brain fart here people, me no remember) person he was talking to and turned to talk to Anissa.

Behind us you can still hear Charlie talking but, I was being good and polite and paying attention to the people I was talking to until that moment. It was like a TV moment. You know when something so outrageous is said that everyone's head whips around to face the speaker at once.
(like the adults in the Charlie Brown cartoons...
kinda funny since it was Charlie talking)

Waawaaa waaa waa waa wa wa
Waawaaa waaa waa waa wa wa
Charlie Capen is a giant cl*t
Waawaaa waaa waa waa wa wa

All of us must have had that OMG did he really say that and then the tweeting began. As the first person tweeted, I felt the need to remind them to add the conference hashtag (#typeacon). And, while person#1 didn't get the official hashtag added, person #2 did...cue evil laugh bwahahahahahahahahaha. Charlie is saying (with a touch of desperation) "1 is a rumor but 2 is confirmation." I tapped Charlie on the shoulder, pointed at Anissa, and said "What does three make it?" Charlie yelled "No, Nissa, no!" And, Anissa looked up, gave him a blank stare and said "I'm handicapped. I didn't hear you." and she kept on typing.

I seriously lost it. Anissa rocked that deadpan delivery. And, that's what s/he said!

Come back later for story 2.

Information Overload, Type-A Style

Almost 80 business cards collected...

Sessions about blog design, coding, vlogging and more...

Long time friends finally met and hugged in person...

Some very special new friends made (maybe even a few lifelong type ones found)...

Made some incredible connections with sponsors and brands...

Got to see some of my favorite bloggy friends for the first time this year...

1 migraine, 1 weird window breakage in the WellsFargo building next door, 8 blue line train rides, many amazing meals, and 2 stories  that beg to be told (have to figure out how)...

The Type-A Parent Conference was amazing and I can't say enough good things about the organizer extraordinaire, Kelby Carr. I have about a million posts to write, a ton of people to email, and about half a million blogs to read and twitter accounts to follow. I just can't do it yet because I am in complete information overload and need to process things. Hope to have my first real Type-A post for you tomorrow...late-ish.

Guest Posts: Kir from The Kir Corner

HI everyone, I'm Kir from The Kir Corner and I'm so happy to be guesting here today at Kristen's blog, while she eats, drinks, dances and has fun at her conference. (I'm only slightly jealous) Plus she and I will be hanging and being roomies at BlogHer this Summer. I can't wait to hug her again, because she is an amazing person who I am so happy to know.

I was going to share some fiction with you today, but I didn't get it written in time. If you'd like to check out what I have in progress right now on my blog, you can click GATHERING BUTTERCUPS and read the story so far or you can click Kimmy & David, the story I wrote last year.

Instead, I am reposting a favorite memoir piece of mine about me, my mom and the way we solve problems. I am sure every woman can relate on some level, even if you don't come from a very CLEAN family like mine.

Here is Cleaning House:

Cleaning House

I come from a long line of women who believed that in order to remain sane,

the house must be dust free.

My earliest memories of bonding with my mother on a Saturday involved , not a trip to the mall with a vanilla shake between us, but rather the smell of lemon polish on  my father's old Tshirts, her voice telling me that they were good to use because they had been washed to a softness that wouldn't scratch our tables. 

And while the amount and extent of those cleanings could run the gamit of the OCD spectrum, where baseboards and windows were a part of weekly cleanings, I grew to  look forward to the times when our tasks were  merely the background music for the retelling of stories from my mom's memory.

While, I scrubbed a bathroom floor I could learn about how my mother grew up and away from her parents and the small town where she grew up, while I organized a sock drawer I was regaled with small glimpses into her life as the only child of a woman who loved a clean home and Bingo and a man who worked nights and enjoyed a card game on occasion.

We would fold clothes and I could relive her  years in nursing school, sneaking cigarettes and shining the white shoes of the seniors on her floor. Her hazing , her time in the Operating Rooms and run ins with the house mother of her dorm making an entire season of Grey's Anatomy look tame and uneventful.

Those stories are what made those days of cleaning tolerable , where  long before Ancestory.com
I was given a sneak peak into the history of my mom's life. Small snippets,  fuzzy pictures of
the things that made her who she was, the past that made her my present.

Sometimes I was awash in tears as I heard about my grandfather telling my mom that he was taking her mother to the hospital and maybe they would be home with a  brother or sister, only to have her mother come home without a sibling and without a uterus.

Others, I was full of fear and disgust for my grandmother who cared more about  her house being clean  &  quiet for her husband, than the hopes and dreams of her daughter. My mom lived a very quiet life in that house. She was hit, she was yelled at, she was diminished all in the name of love, she sought to be someone else. Better.

But there were also many times  she would let us take a break and we would sit on our couch , with the windows open and the sounds and smells of Spring filling our living room and she would make me laugh with stories of her aunts and uncles, Russian Christmases, the tiny tics and quirks that make a family. I would have her tell those kinds of stories over and over again. Watching her smile fade in and out as she rememeberd. 

Her big blue eyes widen and her laughter booming over me. I was lost in that world of  some people I would only know from her memories and others I would see at the next family get together.
This is how we communicate, my mother and I. We scrub and scour sinks and each other's psyches. We cannot sit quietly and rehash, we must have a table to wash, a load of laundry to hang on a line, or a bucket full of water between us to make the conversation meaningful.
My tribe of females doesn't  bond over baking dishes, kitchen aid mixers, or cupcake pans, we find our solace in soft rags covered in Pledge and under the comforters we place and straighten on our beds. Pulling and pushing them into place, fluffing a pillow, sliding a hand back over to remove the invisible wrinkles.

We've  dealt with the death of my father, my grandmother 's illness and subsequent move to an assisted living and my infertility by organzining closets and filling garbage bags with clothes bound for the Salvation Army. We have grieved and rejoiced, we have lamented and connected with our hands pruning in those  buckets full of sudsy water.

This is the way of my family, the place I come from.

One where a clean home can hide the hurt of all the clutter beneath it.

Thank you for letting me be here today Kristen, can't wait to see you in a few short weeks!!!

xo

Kir

WTF Top Five

Hi All, Y'all!

I'm Jjiraffe from Too Many Fish To Fry.  I'm very honored to post today on Kristin's amazeballs blog, while she's off being AWESOME at the Type-A Conference. Dragondreamer's Lair is one of the first welcoming places I found when I started reading infertility blogs, so to be a guest poster now for Kristin feels like a true privilege. Kristin prompted me to write one of my favorite posts, ever just like she inspires countless bloggers all the time.

One of my very favorite things about Kristin's blog is her What The Fuck Wednesday. I've seen many strange things, but I don't think there's much more that tops the Louis Vuitton sticker car or, most recently, the iPhone umbilical charger.

So I thought I would share some of my favorite WTF moments from across the Web in honor of Kristin.

Here is my Top Five Biggest Internet WTF List:

1. I mean, you can't NOT have Cake Wrecks on a WTF list, right? My personal favorite Cake Wrecks post of all time is the "Problem with Phone Orders" cake.

2.  Remember "Ridiculously Photogenic Guy?" Dude was running a 10k and was caught in a random picture and became an instant meme. Seriously, who looks THAT GOOD while running a race? Also, I just learned his name is Zeddie Little and he is seriously adorable even when he's not running races.

3. Yes, auto-correct gets a lot of crap for its epic misspellings and substituted words. But what about spellcheck? Trust The Bloggess to catch this one...

4. Sick of hearing that song "Call Me Maybe?" You won't be after watching this rendition of a lovesick corgi barking it out. Seriously high-production values on this one. Watching this is like sitting in a rainbow on a hammock while a unicorn brings you a sweet tea and a kitten dances for you.

5. Finally, this one defies words. It was created by Matt Mulholland (a New Zealand comedian) and it belongs in a museum.

Do you have any good WTFs from life or the Internets? Please feel free to post them in the comments...and Kristin, I hope you are having a RAD time :)

Type-A Conference

Hey y'all, I'm hoping to have a few posts (pictures included) from the Type-A Conference in the beautiful city of Charlotte but I'm not promising anything. I will promise a complete wrap up once I get home on Monday. Until then, I have a couple of fabulous guest posters lined up for tomorrow and Saturday.

Hope everyone has a fantabulous weekend and I hope I didn't forget anything vital. Also, if any of you happen to see the hashtag #streakCharlotte in the #TypeACon twitter stream, please make sure Kelby is looking the other direction.

Trip the Light Fantastic

Y'all, the effort to teach our kids that drugs don't pay has been dealt a serious blow and the blow was frakking hilarious! When we were down at my parents' house, we all went to see Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted together. I honestly can't tell you who liked the movie more...the kids or the adults. I think this might have been the best of all the Madagascar movies. We all laughed so much and, during more than one scene, I was convinced that they has to have been on hallucinogenics to even come up with something like that. As the credits rolled, Marty looked at me and said "They forgot to put one person in the credits...they forgot to include their drug supplier."

As the credits were rolling, Gabe decided he desperately had to go to the bathroom so my dad headed out with him while the rest of us gathered up our stuff. As we walked out of the theater, I heard shrieks of laughter coming from the bathroom...shrieks of laughter that I KNEW were coming from Gabe. I was almost afraid to find out what was going on. Turns out that the shrieks of laughter were my dad's fault this time. He cracked Gabe up when he started doing this "you have to move it, move it" dance while they were drying their hands. I think he must have had a contact high from watching the movie.

I can't even begin to explain how much fun we all had. It really was a trip. And, while the teaser trailer and the second trailer gave you an idea what the movie is like, the true insanity of Madagascar 3 is captures in this Afro Circus Remix...you have to watch it...

To post or not to post...

I have many things I want to post about.

I want to tell y'all about Madagascar 3 and the familial insanity that ensued.

I want to join in with the "things I'm afraid to tell you" posts over on Sluiter Nation.

I want to tell you about the AMAZING place we went to lunch this week.

I want to tell you about all the fun this week.

Instead, I'm getting ready to shut down my 'puter because I have a migraine. I thought I had it beat but sitting here has made it come screaming back. Catch you on the flip side, y'all.

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow...

For three years, Joey has been letting his hair grow. It was long and curly and beautiful...but, it was pretty high maintenance. If it was not thoroughly brushed each and every day, sometimes twice or more a day, it could develop horrible knots. And, when I say thoroughly brushed, it involved wetting it with a spritz bottle of water, using leave in conditioner, and at least 15 minutes of work.

Joey decided he wanted to cut it before his week of boy scout camp this summer...a notion I whole-heartedly supported. I was having nightmares about how bad it would be if he spent the week at boy scout camp sans shower (rumors say this occurs frequently...they think swimming is enough). So, on Saturday, I got to play hair dresser and this is the story in pictures.

final long hair picture

ponytail down

Samurai Joe

Flock of Seagulls wanna be

the finished product

lookin' good

I think he looks great! What do y'all think?

In just one moment...

In just one thought...

In just one breath...

In just one moment, your world can change.

Yesterday, I got a poignant reminder of just how fast it can really happen. When I logged on late last night, I saw an announcement that broke my heart. Mrs. TDJ, a lovely woman I met through Monnie's blog, lost the love of her lifetime. On Saturday, with no warning, Mrs. TDJ's husband, her high school sweetheart, passed away.

Like Vic and me, Mrs. TDJ and her husband had spent 20 years together. Unlike us, she now has to figure out how to make it without her soulmate, how to be enough for their son. All of a sudden I got a sense of what it would be like, the magnitude of the loss...

All of a sudden, I found myself thinking, how would I manage if I ever had to live without my beloved. My heart shattered into a million pieces at even the thought of a loss like that.

Even if you don't know her, please keep Mrs. TDJ and her son in your prayers. And, in the mean time, stop and call your sisters...
hug your parents...
love your children without limitation...

make love with abandon...
hold each other close...
tell your partner you love and treasure them...

chase your dreams...
make some memories...
tell stories to your babies...

talk about your fears...
talk about your disappointments...
celebrate your triumphs...

Don't miss a moment of your life because it can all change in just one moment.

I forgot to breathe...

I've had an insanely busy 24 hours. Last night, at about this time, I realized that if I was going to pack for a week away, I had laundry that needed to be done. So, at about 11 pm on Saturday, I put the first of three loads of laundry in. The laundry wasn't 100% completed before I went to bed but I was down to only needing one transfered into the dryer when it was finished washing (Thanks Vic!...jealous much, my husband cooks, cleans, AND does laundry). When I stumbled back to bed at about 2:30 am, I set my alarm for 9. I figured the kids (at least the younger 2)&) would be up by then.

The one time in my life it would be helpful if they were up earlyish, they slept in. I put on a pot of coffee and sat down to read the news while it brewed. Gabe was up before the coffee was done and Joey wasn't two far behind. While they were waking up and eating breakfast, I folded 3 loads of laundry (whee fun...normally, Vic would fold it but they ha a really busy night at work) and knocked back my first cup of coffee. I started trying to wake Marty up at 10:30 so we could start packing for our trip out of town.The younger two and I got started picking out the clothes to bring with us and Marty finally dragged ass out of bed at about 11. God, I miss those teenage hours. I had the kids completely packed (clothes, electronic gadgets, chargers, Marty's school books, etc) by about 11:45. Now, I had to pack myself and get dressed. By 12:40, I was cleaned up, dressed and had my clothes and everyones toiletries and meds packed. By 1:20, I had all my work and projects I need to work on packed.

Did I mention that Gabe had a birthday party to go to that started at 2 and I still had to get to the store and pick up some things Vic was going to need over the course of the week? Yeah, since we were going to be gone, Vic picked up some overtime shifts and knew he wouldn't have time to get to the store so I had that to fit in too. Miraculously, Gabe and I walked into the party only 15 minutes after it started and he had a blast "skating". I say skating in quotes because, well, he is 6 and has only been on skates one other time. You can imagine how graceful he was. We left the party at 4:45 and I made it home in time to kiss my husband through his vehicle window as he left for work. At this point, I had 2 hours and 15 minutes to get everything wrapped up and get out the door so I could arrive at our destination in time (btw, our destination is an hour and 10 minutes away from my house).

In one hour, the kids and I loaded the van, tied two bikes to the top of the van, loaded the dish washer, made sure the dogs had been out, and got ourselves and both dogs in the van for the drive to my parents, house. I also broke up the hundred zillionth fight in 24 hours between my kids and threatened them with a complete ban on talking for the entire drive if they didn't reform themselves. We left the house at 5:45 and pulled into the parking lot of my mom's church at 6:55...with 5 minutes to spare. See, Gabe had an ice cream social for the day camp he will be attending this week. My parents met us in the parking lot and my Dad took my van, the dogs, and the two older kids back to their house. Gabe, my mom, and I went to his ice cream social. After the ice cream social which Gabe piggy backed onto birthday party food, we headed back to my parents'  house with a quick side trip to by sunscreen. Gabe proceded to spent the remainder of the evening eating his way through a large piece of pizza, about a pound of grapes, a few pieces of chocolate, a serving size container of pringles, and a granny smith apple. Gabe and Joey went to bed late. Marty is winding down for the night. Even the dogs are asleep. The quiet is calling to me and I'm about ready to go to sleep myself.

Oh shit, I think I hear Gabe calling bellowing for me...

I guess it's time to go again.

Tune in tomorrow for pictures of Joey's new haircut. You won't believe it.