"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Sunday, October 04, 2009

What Not To Wear: Wayne County Fair Edition

I love beautiful clothes. I love seeing someone well put together. But, honestly, that isn't what I expect to see at a county fair. I expect to see people wearing casual clothes. Even among casual clothes, there are certain things that scream out "DON'T WEAR ME!" Here are a few of the charming selections I saw at the fair yesterday.
Sun protection is a good thing but an umbrella hat just screams "I have no clue." Wear a fishing type hat, something with a full brim, but, please dear God, do NOT wear an umbrella on your head.
See those lovely clear plastic straps? Well, they would be bad enough if they were the spaghetti straps that belonged to that shirt, but they aren't. That shirt is a halter top and those lovely clear plastic straps are bra straps. Just say NO to bra strap flashing (can't even call it bra strap peak-a-boo because each whole damned strap shows).
Adult men do NOT need to wear thugwear. When the crotch of your jeans is a full 10+ inches below your ass, you are WRONG! And, see those lovely aqua skin tight jeans in the next picture? Even on a young woman, not the best idea. But, on a young man, they scream bad fashion choice.
And, finally, when the bottom of your shorts are approximately even with your crotch, leaving 4+ inches of ass cheek showing, DO NOT LEAVE THE HOUSE. You have either been shopping in your smaller sister's lingerie drawer or you have no common sense whatsoever.

What's the worst fashion choice you've seen in public? Do any of them beat this fine selection of fashion wrecks?


*In answer to WiseGuy's question, I did take the pictures. Thank God my camera has a good zoom.

17 comments:

Another Dreamer said...

Oh my, LMAO!!! I needed that :)

Lollipop Goldstein said...

Still laughing as I type this. I have to say that the clear plastic bra straps are a special pet peeve of mine.

Kymberli said...

Have you seen peopleofwalmart.com? The Sexy is there. Rrrawwrrr.

The ass cheek labels "cracked" me up!

Nina said...

Where are these people's mothers!?!

A Mom in Jacksonville, FL said...

What a hoot! Super funny (and scary) post! :)

Billy said...

those bra straps.. can't stand the thought of that plastic on my body!

MrsSpock said...

I love it! It's your own version of People of Walmart!

Rachel said...

That was too funny! Our county fair was last week also. What are people thinking when they leave their house? Ohh wait... they're not!

chicklet said...

I'm sure I've seen something, but I can't think of it right now. That was awesome:-)

dreamsofquiet said...

Kym and Mrs. Spock beat me to it...it's totally like people of walmart!

Too funny!

Barb said...

hahaha. Always at a county fair. gotta love it.

I just saw a girl shopping at an outlet trying SOOOOOoo hard to be trendy and fashion forward, but who SOOOO wasn't even looking good. It was awful. She had on a gray t-shirt with colored hearts all over it. That gray t-shirt was tucked tightly into kinda bulky gray sweatshorts that were pulled up to the Urkel line. Then she had those new shoes on that cover most of your foot in leather and laces, but leave the toes out? In black. And her hair was up with combs and clips via the '80's.... which I understand is coming back, but oh man this was not pretty.

Oh, and she had fancy black cuff bracelets on that you'd normally wear with something nice. NOT pretty.

WiseGuy said...

I completely loved this post...Did you take the pictures...

Somehow India is in the grip of 'lovely clear plastic straps'...

'Cool' girls have them seeing through...if they did not show through, how would you know that she had the 'lovely clear plastic straps'?

I remember a horrible make-up episode....I was at a McD, where a girl in the next line...in a really fake sputtery-accent asked for some burger.

The boy serving her was smirking, and whispering to the fellow next to him, and I realized it was not the accent that had him in splits...

...she had two perfectly round colored circles on her cheek of 'red blush'...she looked like a clown...she had not blended in the colour, and she had made dark red perfect circles on her cheeks!

Meari said...

LOL... Unfortunately, I've seen some of those same things in public. What's wrong with crotch length shorts? lol Oh, that's right... I don't leave the house in mine! hahahaha

I'm with you on the fashtion faux paux!

battynurse said...

I love it. This is great. One if my bigger pet peeves is the whole "lets where super small skin tight clothes" no matter what size you are. It seems like the style has been to buy clothes a size or two too small but to see a bigger girl wearing a shirt or pants that is so obviously too small that it's too short with rolls hanging out and everything bugs me. You can still be a big girl and dress nice. The ass cheek thing is pretty annoying too.

Beautiful Mess said...

AHAHAHAHA!!!! I love that you took these pictures yourself! I agree with everything you said! Maybe that gal didn't kn ow that you can buy a bra WITH convertible straps on it.

I'm going to be on the look out for pictures to take today while at school. *SQUEAL* I can't wait!
*HUGS*

Aunt Becky said...

Dude. Those are HOT.

Flying Monkeys said...

Hilarious!! I have a pair of pants that do the low crotch thing though, unfortunately I didn't realize how bad until I got some pictures uploaded this weekend. It's sweet!