"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Monday, September 29, 2008

Welcome to the home of the King Street Players

Today's drama production features the Drama King of Cary...


starring as the much beleaguered middle schooler (MBMS) and his mom...

starring as the eeeevil mother (EM). The scene opens with the phone ringing just as eeeevil mom was getting ready to walk son #2 to the bus stop.

EM: Hello
MBMS (in a pitiful voice): Mom...I just puked.
this child was fine this weekend, was fine this morning and ate a good breakfast
EM: What happened?
MBMS: I just got sick. I don't know what happened.
EM: Marty, you've missed too many days. You were out 5 days because of Grandpa's funeral and you were sick a couple of days. You can't miss anymore.
MBMS: But moooooom, I feel terrible. Please, please, please.
adlib much begging and pleading by MBMS and many refusals to budge by EM
EM: Don't you remember our talk when you were sick last time? If you miss too many more you will be beyond the limit missed for the semester. You said you understood.
MBMS: But Mom, I didn't know I would feel this bad this soon.
EM: You have to stay in school. But, I can bring you medicine.
MBMS: Can't we talk about it when you get here?
EM: No. There is nothing to talk about. If you don't have a fever, you have to stay at school. Your only options are me bringing you medicine or not bring you medicine.
MBMS: (huffily) Fine, I'll see you when you get here.

EM gathers the medicine and loads son #3 into the car.
EM arrives at the school and walks in the office to encounter much begging and pleading by MBMS. MBMS admittedly looks a bit peakish.

MBMS: Mom, I'm dying here. Can't I please come home?
EM: No dear. You can not come home.
again...adlib much begging and pleading by MBMS and many refusals to budge by EM
EM (to secretary): Do you have a thermometer?
EM: If you don't have a fever, you will stay in school.
fast forward a little bit, thermometer shows NO FEVER
EM: Ok...take your medicine and go back to class.
MBMS: You don't car about me. Come one mom, give me a break for once in my life.
EM: I do care...
MBMS: No you don't. You don't care. You don't love me. I'm dying here.
EM: If I didn't love you, I wouldn't put up with this.
EM: The discussion is over, you need to go back to class.
MBMS: Fine, I won't talk to you ever again.

After multiple repeats of the begging and many near bouts of tears, MBMS stomps off as best as he can while on cruches. EM drives home shaking her head and the screen fades to black.

This has been the most recent production of the King Street Players. Thanks for your interest. Check back in on a regular basis and we'll bring you many further episodes fill with teen-age angst, infuriating toddlers, and whiny 7 year olds.

12 comments:

Margaret said...

ROTFL.

I have been VERY blessed by a high schooler who happens to love school, hates the hassle of getting assignments from friends, and not crazy about boring life at home with MM!!!

Jenn said...

Awwwwww, that was SO ME in high school! YOu are smart to make him suffer and develop good habits now. Otherwise he will end up like me with negative sick leave!

Ken's choice said...

That could have been my story,
I recognize the "you don't love me " bit.
but my mom never kept me at home, only when I was really ill.
I think you did right Kristin !!
poor Marty, how is his foot doing ?

Emma said...

You did the right thing, but I know how hard it is. Christopher has a stomach ache at least once a week, though it seems to disappear when he sees his school friends. I too look for a fever before I let them stay home.

Velda said...

lol we have similar productions here on occassion :)

Christa said...

I have to say I can't wait to see the near-future installments to this piece. I chuckle because one day Marty will see the wisdom...probably when he's raising his own kids. LOL!

Ophelia said...

I spent the better half of my grade school years in the nurse's office complaining of sore throats. Everyone wrote me off as an attention starved idiot until my pediatrician realized my tonsils were all messed up and needed to be removed. They took them out when I was 7. I didn't get sick again until I was 10 (almost 11) and contracted mono.

Cara said...

I have a budding thesbian too but more of the social drama type. I'll be back for advice you EM, you!!!

MrsSpock said...

As the daughter of a nurse, this was a pretty typical exchange. I had to be on death's door before I could stay home.

Of course, this led to my calling myself in sick in middle school. Ha!

Anonymous said...
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Kristin said...
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Kristin said...

ARRRGH...some how I deleted those last two comments and I didn't mean too!