"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Monday, October 18, 2004

Waiting SUCKS!!!

I am not by nature a patient person but lately it feels like all I am doing is waiting. I've waited to get pregnant...I've waited to see if any of them were sticky pregnancies...I've waited for test results and waited for retests. I have only one major thing to say...WAITING SUCKS! Right now I am waiting for results from my repeat bloodwork. After we lost Eva, I finally had the standard infertility workup done. And, before any of you start ranting about my docs waiting too long, the timing of the tests was my choice. One of the major things they check for in the infertility work up is clotting disorders. Although my overall results were in the normal range, my *ptt came back low. A low ptt result indicates a faster than normal clotting time...and, if the retest confirms this, we could have the final piece of the puzzle of why I've lost so many pregnancies after carrrying two babies successfully.

Puzzle piece number 1 was found after my third consecutive loss (5 loss cummulatively) when I had my serum progesterone level checked on cd 21 (which for me is 7 dpo). My level was only 8.2 which is lower than the 10 that most docs believe you need to carry a pregnancy successfully. I had one more extremely early loss and, once my body was responding to the progesterone suppositories the way it should, we conceived Eva. I had such high hopes for that pregnancy but it was all for naught. My little girl's heart stopped beating somewhere around 9 weeks along and I found out 5 days later. At this point, we decided we wanted all the testing done that could be done. This was when we found puzzle piece number 2. Because I had read an article about contaminated well water causing multiple miscarriages, we decided we should have our well water tested. We had bought our house brand new through my evil ex-BIL and, when I called the Enviromental Health Dept. about retesting our well water, I found out the son of a bith had NEVER tested our water to begin with....arrgh. Testing should our well to be contaminated with bacteria...and we've been in our house for 3 1/2 years. I could have ripped him to shreds with my bare hands when I found out what he had done to us. Our well has since been decontaminated and retested and all is clean. I'm hoping that this retest bloodwork will provide us with the third and final puzzle piece to explain our losses...please dear God let it be the final puzzle piece. I should get the results back in the next few days...and they had better be back by then or I may storm the LabCorp offices to get them.

*ptt = partial thromboplastin time