"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing. " -Helen Keller

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

I reject your reality and substitute my own!

Lately, I feel like this quote applies to so many areas of my life. One of the main areas it seems to apply to is in the reaction to a post I guest authored for my friend Monnie's blog, Rantings of a Creole Princess. If you haven't read it, my post dealt with racism. When you write about a topic like that, you expect it to draw heated response...but dayum. I feel like all my words were twisted and interpreted b-ass-ackward. A charming individual named Nicole said "FIRST of all, why do some white people think that just because they're married to someone who is non-white, or work with non-white people they MUST be free of prejudice?"

Nicole...I never frickin said I was free from prejudice. My prejudice just doesn't have to do with people of color. It has to do with people who are dumbasses. Of course I have prejudices...I am a frickin human being. I try to be good. I try to live by the laws left to us by God...But, I AM NOT PERFECT. Never have been, never will be. I at least recognize that in myself, do you?

And then there was Roslyn...she said "Why is it that whites only get concerned about racism when they're on the receiving end?" Talk about making assumptions and judgments. What else does she know about me other than what is in my post? NOT ONE DAMNED THING! She has no clue the number of times I have spoken out against racism...no clue that the vast majority of times I was not the target. Racism fricking SUCKS...don't care who the target is.

Tell me you agree...tell me you disagree...but don't put words and sentiments in my mouth that were NEVER there.

The other part of my life that this title quote of "I reject your reality and substitute my own!" is in dealing with a specific relative. You repeatedly tell her how it works in my husband's job...you repeatedly tell her funds are limited and we can't afford for the whole family to do x, y, or z..she seems to understand but, within 2 weeks, you are having the same damned conversation again and again and again. Because what you tell her doesn't agree with her "reality", she lets it go in one ear and out the other. ARRGGHHHH


wiccanstitcher said...

I really like this quote Kristin and could apply to my own life sometimes. I read your post on the other site and just loved every bit of it. People are so good at twisting words to suit their benefit.

Kristin said...

Hey sweetie...I got the quote from one of the hosts of the show Mythbusters...and he got it from a movie called The Dungeonmaster.

Margaret said...

HUGS dear. Some people are just unhappy people and can't be nice. I'm sorry you've run into some.

JMK said...

Kristin, I enjoyed your post over on Creole in DC and felt it was well-thought out and nicely articulated. It's certainly generated discussion, hasn't it? Too bad it hasn't acheived what Monica hoped for.

CreoleInDC said...

But hey...maybe it has. I've been all over blogland this morning and a lot of people are talking about race. REALLY talking about it. So hey...maybe the residuals are going to be EXACTLY what I was hoping for.

Kristin said...

Janet and Monnie...thanks. I guess it has had a good effect...just not when and where we hoped for.

Kristin said...

Margaret and Venessa...thanks for dropping in and everything else.

DJ Black Adam said...

Kristen, don’t sweat it. Bottom line is that the subject generates emotions, and when people are typing to each other a lot is lost as far as intent because something’s are hard to communicate in the written medium.

People can only respond to what they are interpreting you are saying from your writing, and trust me, as a theologian myself; “interpreting” writings can cause a world of trouble and misunderstanding.

It’s all good, your post triggered a lot of conversation and thought about the issues surrounding race in America.

Gunfighter said...


I read your post and never got the impression that you are a racist.

Personally, I thought your post was thoughtful, and your positions were sound.



Anonymous said...

Doesn't it seem like someone is always looking for a reason to fight? I think your article was great very well put!

Christa said...

I was really glad to see productive discussion was generated about this somewhere, even if it wasn't on Monica's site.

Justina said...

I thought your entry was well written and thought provoking. Isn't that what it is all about?

Lioness said...

Well, I've just left a long rant - honestly, as an Anthropologist, it makes me demented to hear some things, to see people portray themselves and pure and innocent when racism and prejudice have so many shades and we all - we bloody all - are guilty of some of those at some point. To take your post and call you a racist - arghhhh!

I once saw an episode of The Apprentice and that Omerosa cow or whatever her name is was fighting w some girl (white) and the girl told her "That's like calling the kettle black" and Omerose, The Incredibly Un-agenda-ed And Clever immediately replies something like "There you go with your racist remarks!"


To me that sums so much of the discussion of racism at its worst, That Omerosa twat annoyed me bcs I cannot abide imbecils and she'd still be an imbecil were she white or a rock for that matter and I refuse to even be pulled into discussing racism with the omerosas of this world bcs all they do is try to ambush you, and rather stupidly at that. Chips on shoulders weigh a lot and I refuse to carry them or even aknowledge them if the chip carrier is this stupid. Sod the bleeding lot of them.