Earlier this evening, I hit a meltdown point. All my stress over everything that's happened just came to a head and I sat here crying and ranting to Jennifer about how I was so tired of having people I love be sick, how tired I was of not having a quiet, peaceful week in my life since as far back as September, how done I was with all this shit. Truthfully, it wasn't that anything new or different or bad had happened today. It was just the simple, little stuff that pushed me over the edge.
For me, holidays are such an important time. It's a time for tradition, family, and friends. And, when it's such an important religious holiday, that adds another whole dimension to the meaning of the day. I always try to do special things for Easter. We always dye eggs, have a fabulous dinner, and really cool baskets for the kids. This year I fell so short of the standards I set for holidays in our house. We totally missed out on dyeing eggs, I was shopping completely last minute for the Easter baskets, and my house was a mess.
Now, I've tamed the emotional monster that was riding my shoulder and beating me up for all I didn't get done. I am better able to appreciate the gifts I have, the blessings I've received. I have the gift of my family. Sure, there have been health issues and struggles but I have them all with me and we will be together to celebrate Easter. We are blessed to have a roof over our heads, food in the pantry, and friends who support us at every turn. And, we are blessed to have insurance that has allowed us to deal with the health issues and my parents who are insuring we can access the schooling options we need to keep Marty current with his classmates.
Since I've managed to tame the demons that had me in meltdown earlier and have been able to truly appreciate the gifts I have in my life, I find myself in a much better place to truly celebrate and recognize the Glory and majesty of what Jesus did for us...how his death, burial, and resurrection brought us redemption from sin and everlasting life with God.
Happy Easter to all my Christian friends.
And, I hope all my Jewish friends have a glorious passover.